Put Down the Cookie « Sizzle Says

Put Down the Cookie

September 27, 2007 at 8:17 am | In everyday frustrations, mountain out of a molehill, my neurosis, spazzing | 24 Comments
Tags: auto parts stores are for suckers, bed rest, sugar bitch

I’m crabby.

I feel like I am coming down with a cold. On top of that, I have PMS. My neck and shoulders are in knots. My back aches. My skin is breaking out and yesterday I ate a cookie. It was not a good scene. Sugar + PMS + Sizzle = Bitchy. I would like to not be me for the next few days. Any way we can arrange that?

Sigh.

I didn’t think so.

I stopped off at the auto parts store yesterday and was assaulted by idiocy. The layout of the store made no sense- merchandise was piled in “displays” all the way up near the counters making it impossible to form any semblance of a line. The most random of people were milling about with confused or harried looks on their faces. The clerks didn’t look like they had a clue and then proved that they didn’t when they attempted to ring a person up. I had a very, very bad feeling about my visit.

Once I got someone to assist me, we had to go through a litany of questions to find what exact part I should by. What kind of car? What model? What year? Am I single? Did the car make a hissing/wooshing noise when the gas cap was unscrewed? Do I like beer? Did I want a locking gas cap? (Ok, the single and the beer question were merely implied with a look not an actual question. And yes, I am totally making that up.)

Once we figured out what I needed and he retrieved it for me, I realized that was just the beginning of my troubles. There was, near the check out counter, an unruly mob of people standing about in no particular order. Where was the line!? How was anyone to get helped in such chaos? As I stood there I observed the clerks with their dazed faces, one trying to help a middle aged woman who was aggressively trying to get him to tell her if her items were in fact the very items in the sale advertisement. She kept shoving the sale paper in his face. “These?! Are THESE the ones for $4.99?!”

Good Lord rescue me.

We stood there and stood there and as the minutes ticked by I grew more agitated. The disorganization! The incompetent help! The annoying people surrounding me, trying to cut in “line”! So I put my item down on the nearest counter and walked out.

Sometimes I just have to leave lest I blow up. Like I said: Sugar + PMS + Sizzle = Bitchy. The bad news is, I still have to get that part today. The new equation could work out like: Head Cold + PMS + Sizzle = Cranky Bitch. Uh, oh. This could get ugly, people.

“Came down on a bottle rocket/Found my heart right where I locked it/Last night like rain on chalk/It’s gone like money in my pocket./All my troubles in the rear view mirror, I know I know/All my troubles in the rear view mirror, I know I know/I got, I got, I got to keep them there…” -Keep It There, The Weepies

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*hug*

Comment by Hunter — September 27, 2007 #
I hate long lines, disorganization and incompetence. Good luck!

Comment by The Diva's Thoughts — September 27, 2007 #
Hmmm, might wanna call the place ahead of time and find out when they’re closing. Or you could just inquire with them when they’re slow.

All else fails, bring a book and a lawn chair. Maybe they’ll get the hint, or maybe they wont and be happy in knowing they have a career full of menial jobs ahead of them.

Comment by Tobiwan — September 27, 2007 #
*smoochy hugs*
They say hot tea can cure most of what ails a person, perhaps that is the tack to take? Hey, at least you didn;t go off in the chaos! So proud of you, setting the thing down and simple walking out! You are my hero!

Comment by Bully — September 27, 2007 #
Ugh, best of luck, dear. Auto parts in general make me cringe.

Comment by justrun — September 27, 2007 #
it’s totally the full moon!

Comment by rosalish — September 27, 2007 #
Hang in there girlfriend

Comment by Bob — September 27, 2007 #
rosalish beat me to it.

Comment by sue — September 27, 2007 #
Put down the cookie and pick up a beer.

I can’t wait to hear about all the people you kill today.

Comment by Lefty — September 27, 2007 #
I hope you did something nice for yourself after all of that!

Comment by alissa — September 27, 2007 #
So glad to hear I’m not the only one that experiences that. And, really, I just can’t help it. I am not able to stand there and watch (or be a part of) the chaos that is bad/ignorant customer service and bad/ignorant customers. Ugh. Best of luck on the next trip!

Comment by Melissa — September 27, 2007 #
I’m sorry to hear you are getting the change of seasons headcold too. :( If you can make time for a nap, I highly recommend them as nature’s cure-all!

Comment by wafelenbak — September 27, 2007 #
I hope you feel better soon.

Comment by hotpinksox — September 27, 2007 #
hunter- you give great hugs.

diva- you and me both, sister.

tobiwan- a book and a lawn chair- now that’s a great idea!

bully- i firmly believe that tea cures most things. even the blues!

justrun- yeah, i generally avoid such places.

rosalish- i know!

bob- thanks, girlfriend. ;)

sue- great minds think alike.

lefty- beer has a lot of sugar too you know…but good thinking. so far (at 2:30pm PST) no one has been killed. (though you comment made me laugh so loudly.)

alissa- i cleaned the cat litter box…does that count?

melissa- i am happy to report the next trip to the same store was a much different experience. thank goodness!

wafelenbak- nap! that sounds glorious.

hotpinksox- thanks my friend.

Comment by sizzlesays — September 27, 2007 #
is there another store you can go to? I would have hated that place!

Comment by Jen — September 27, 2007 #
I am all about queuing. If there is no line to speak of and people start ‘butting’ I lose it…every time. I’m like you though, I simply put down my stuff and leave. It’s not worth the trouble or the stress.

I hope things get better for you! :)

Comment by Megan — September 27, 2007 #
I would like to not be me for the next few days.

God, I’ve been there, many times, and NOT just when PMSing.

Comment by TC — September 27, 2007 #
you know, i hate people.

and i hope you feel better!

Comment by gorillabuns — September 27, 2007 #
jen- there probably is but this one is so conveniently located.

megan- glad to know i am not the only one. things DID get better, thanks!

tc- me too. ME TOO.

buns- you?! hate people!? ;) things are looking up.

Comment by sizzlesays — September 28, 2007 #
Dude, eat that cookie with pride. ENJOY it for that matter. We all need a little comfort from month to month, time to time.

Midol extra strength helps take the edge off, in case you are looking for some “help” out there.

people are idiots. such a drag, isn’t it?

what kind of cookie was it?

Comment by little miss mel — September 28, 2007 #
This is the feeling I am talking about when I say that shopping makes me feel stressed. Shopping for anything…just too much for me sometimes.

I feel for you, and hope everything is going better now!

Comment by tori — September 28, 2007 #
I’m a guy, and I can’t stand the auto parts store. As if everyone is supposed to be some kind of gear head. The condescending ass hats. Piss me off royal!

Comment by Mumbly — September 28, 2007 #
Sizzle+nap+a nice alcoholic beverage+online ordering of auto part= happy?!?

Hope your weekend made it all melt away!

Comment by skyzi — October 1, 2007 #
I hope it got better Sizzle. Shopping for anything but food stresses me out.

Comment by Josie — October 1, 2007 #