Out of Balance

April 29, 2008 at 6:42 am | In my neurosis, processing, spazzing | 43 Comments

For those of you who are a bit befuddled, this current template is not my new template. Oh no! It’s the first one that I grabbed off the free WordPress designs because the old one got screwed up the moment I upgraded my CSS. (Do I sound all technical? Totally hawt.) I got a sneak peak at the new layout and it’s gonna blow your mind. Ok, maybe just your socks off. Hopefully we’ll be able to get it up and running by the end of the week.

Until then, we have this easy-to -read template with the largest comment box & font known to bloggerkind.

I have been feeling really out of sorts lately. Like stressed out, fatigued, irritable and borderline depressed. (It’s not PMS.) Somethings in my life are just not working. My current line of work isn’t fulfilling to me any more. Working multiple jobs is leaving me void of energy. I’m struggling to balance obligations with a social life, not to mention alone time. Right now I am just in the complaining stage but soon, something will shift. I am going to a workshop this weekend entitled, “Your Life’s Work: Opening to Your Calling.” I’m hoping it will awaken my spirit and help me find some clarity.

Many of my loved ones are going through stressful, difficult times. I’m like an emotional sponge and it’s hard for me to be logical when my heart is too much in it. I find myself at times frantically searching for that cape I threw away thinking, “I can rescue them!” No, no no. No, Sizzle! I feel a bit useless without my old rescue complex but I have learned the hard way, we’ve all got to rescue ourselves.

And so I am trudging through trying to find the bright side and knowing that this too will pass. Eventually.

43 Comments »

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  1. I think I just saw something about those workshops on Oprah. (Not that I watch Oprah or anything… um.. yeah…). Hope it brings you some help. Nothing is worse than having so many areas of your life feel out of control. It will pass, you know it will. However you don’t have to be a cheerleader until it does. Just let yourself ‘be’. Tell the Fella he needs to give ya a hug… and an extra one from me.

    Comment by sue — April 29, 2008 #

  2. If you are going to talk all technical could you throw in a pic of your beautiful smile? lol

    Comment by NerdGirl — April 29, 2008 #

  3. I feel like this about once a year. It makes me pause and reassess and work to make it better. I think it always gets better because I take the time to give those feelings my attention. It took me a long time to realize I had to rescue myself even if it felt easier to rescue the people around me instead. *Hugs*

    Comment by Keely — April 29, 2008 #

  4. it’s probably because you were really hyped about the move and the new job and then the reality of it didn’t quite match up to the dream. i’ve had one of those feelings over where i moved to just the other week. it does take time to get over it tho :/

    i hope things feel better for you soon *hugs*

    Comment by Ys — April 29, 2008 #

  5. You are totaly making me want to re-do my blog in this style. I know it’s temporary here, but it gives me the redecorating itchies!
    :-)

    I know what you mean about the rescue complex. Yeah I do. When you don;t step forward even emotionally to “help” and feel like you are doing “something”? It makes you feel depressed and useless. I don’t know what the answer is for us, aside from after awhile it’s like giving up sugar– you get used to it?? Will that day come?*sigh*

    You do have alot on your plate. You’ll sort it out tho, of that I have no fear. Give yourself a hug for me, sweetheart.

    Comment by Bully — April 29, 2008 #

  6. Oh I have been having WordPressy issues too… they are making my brain hurt…

    Comment by maman — April 29, 2008 #

  7. This too shall pass…

    Hope that the workshop gives you some ideas. *hug*

    Comment by Alison — April 29, 2008 #

  8. It really is all about balance, isn’t it? For me, when work is really crazy and stressful, home life needs to be organized or calm, and vice versa. If I can feel like at least one thing is in my control, it seems to make me feel better about the madness elsewhere.

    Hope you find that calm soon!

    Comment by jenny — April 29, 2008 #

  9. Good look, keep breathing. And holy hell this font is huge.

    Comment by ammanners — April 29, 2008 #

  10. Woah, the font is huge! I thought those folks were exaggerating a bit.

    I’m in the same boat with the bad feelings, though am thinking mine is PMS… at least I’m hoping. It passes. Eventually everything does. But it’s hard while it lasts.

    Comment by Fluffycat — April 29, 2008 #

  11. This happened to me in November and December. A lot of things were going on, my family members were all having huge struggles, and I absorbed SO MUCH stress because of it. It was really awful. It’s mostly passed now, or maybe I just got used to it, but I’m definitely feeling better. I hope you do, too.

    Comment by Jess — April 29, 2008 #

  12. Coming back from a weekend in the country really left me thinking about “trimming the fat” from my life. I am feeling a major shift, too. Anxious to see what the workshop brings you. :)

    Comment by diane — April 29, 2008 #

  13. The workshop sounds fabulous! Something will shift, change will come and the world will look bright again. If nothing else (and there is MUCH else!) you have a new template on the way!

    Besides, who says giant comment text isn’t cool?

    Comment by Vanessa — April 29, 2008 #

  14. that workshop sounds really interesting – please let us know how it goes and what you learn… i often wonder what my true ‘calling’ is (as i’m sure most people do) and hope i can say, “i really love what i do” before i die… :o)

    Comment by jodi — April 29, 2008 #

  15. Good luck Miss Sizzle. The workshop this weekend sounds interesting.

    Hang in there!

    Comment by brookem — April 29, 2008 #

  16. Please don’t blow my socks off. It took me 20 minutes just to find a matching pair.

    Comment by Lefty — April 29, 2008 #

  17. Looking forward to getting my socks blown off!! =)

    Comment by justduckie73 — April 29, 2008 #

  18. I hope the workshop gives you some ideas- I’m interested to hear what comes of it. I’ll wish for less stressful times for you and your family in the not so distant future.

    Comment by punchlinewalking — April 29, 2008 #

  19. I just have this feeling that once you get what you really want to do sorted, you’re going to rock it out. Hang tough, chica!

    Comment by claire — April 29, 2008 #

  20. In AA they call it trudging the road to happy destiny. For me, it has always meant that nothing, no matter how difficult in the moment, lasts forever. And if I can concentrate on just doing the next right thing, the next step, no matter how small, I will come out where I am supposed to be.

    I find, too, that when my life gets where your’s seems to be, and I don’t know what to do, I try not to do anything. This is because I know from experience that the Universe will make it clear what I am supposed to do. Sometimes in a very brutal way, but still.

    And the last time I was at that point, I moved here. :-)

    Comment by Tracy Lynn — April 29, 2008 #

  21. One of my favourite quotes – what does not kill you makes you stronger.

    I repeat it to myself often ;)

    The workshop sounds great – I hope it helps you balance everything!

    Comment by Angella — April 29, 2008 #

  22. Maybe you rescuing yourself will inspire one of the other people in need of rescuing. Two birds with one stone (or workshop in this case. :)

    Comment by Mel Heth — April 29, 2008 #

  23. I have 2 words for you sweetie, lipstick & wine. Those 2 words will cure all (or most) of your short term ills by which time things will have settled down again ;o)
    (It works for me!)

    Comment by Penelope — April 29, 2008 #

  24. one day at a time, my friend. we aren’t responsible for the emotions of others!! take care.

    Comment by Robin — April 29, 2008 #

  25. Yay! I am exited to see the new digs!

    You just keep on with that great thinking, girl. Capes are so pre-2008 anyway. ;)

    Comment by justrun — April 29, 2008 #

  26. Funny you should mention it, the large comment box reminds me of the phone my grandma had that was so large you practically had to use your entire palm to push down an individual button.

    I’m sorry you are stressed and overwhelmed. That’s where I was a year ago before I made my crazy move to Utah: working F/T in a cubicle and working the equivalent of a second F/T job doing crisis intervention in the evenings and weekends. Take care of yourself, things will get better.

    Comment by Pants — April 29, 2008 #

  27. SWEETIE! Whooaa, Large font.

    Back to where I was ……. hey chica bonita! You are extremely talented and ambitious and have a great mind! Are you thirsty for something new?! A sponge of knowledge ye’ are! It will come together Sizzle, it will all come forth … I’m excited for you. Because I have a funny feeling you can make anything happen.

    Comment by gibsondog — April 29, 2008 #

  28. I swear Siz we are the same person sometimes. I was feeling the same way last week and this weekend. Totally stressed emotionally, physically, everything felt like it was busting at the seams. Money is/was stressing me. Life in general was making me nuts. I felt like I couldn’t get a break. I finally just had to say, “this stressor I am letting go of for now and I am not letting it effect me anymore.” There is beauty in letting go and taking charge of other parts that are easier to handle. For me the thing I felt I could handle, was cleaning my closet, selling some clothes and simplifying my life that way.

    I hope you feel better soon.

    HUG!

    Comment by hotpinksox — April 29, 2008 #

  29. I go thru that from time to time, especially if I’m feeling out of sorts with work stuff. So weird how much of an effect worklife has on you. Making changes always makes me feel better. Hope your days brighten soon.

    Comment by skiplovey — April 29, 2008 #

  30. I don’t have socks on. It is warm, it is sunny. My computer says its almost 50 degrees!!!!
    I guess you will have to blow my mind. Can you give us hints… the suspense is just too much. (I’m burnt out on work too… this is much more fun than actually working) We could trade jobs… but I don’t think I could handle volunteers, it’s hard enough getting people who are paid to show up.

    Comment by kim — April 29, 2008 #

  31. I ended up having to redo my design because the TWO upgrades I’ve been through recently totally screwed up my ability to edit my sidebar. Grrrr.

    I’m sorry to hear that you’re out of sorts. I hope you feel more centered soon.

    Comment by Stacey — April 29, 2008 #

  32. Being “Captain Save a Hoe” is hard work and really should be left entirely up to them, not you, which you know but worry is exhausting nonetheless.

    Anyway, I think you are saying that I may want to make out with your new design and that makes me EXCITED and possibily a leeetle bit jealous!

    I can’t wait!

    Comment by Kandace — April 29, 2008 #

  33. I totally get the family/friend sponge thing…I absorb and then go into fix mode too. It’s so hard to not. Hang in there Sizz…and have fun at your seminar, sounds really interesting.

    Comment by Foo — April 29, 2008 #

  34. While I appreciate and love your saving abilities – me thinks you should take a vacation from this attribute for awhile.:)

    Comment by gorillabuns — April 29, 2008 #

  35. Must be that time of year. Alot of bloggers are going through ‘the change’. hehehe

    Comment by Kerry — April 29, 2008 #

  36. Hang in there my friend. I could sure use the seminar you are attending. And I am going back to counseling to help me deal with post-surgery issues. It’s amazing how a surgery can save your life, but kinda ruin it, too.

    And, holy crap, I just realized I shared a lot there, sorry.
    When I need a bright side, I melt cheese over something. It doesn’t really matter what, as long as the cheese gets all gooey-y.

    Hang in there, Siz, if I can call you Siz…
    ;-)

    Comment by Michael C — April 29, 2008 #

  37. Hawt can’t wait to see the new layout.

    Try to be good to yourself; you deserve it.

    Comment by jonb — April 29, 2008 #

  38. My life is stressed enough lately that I finally went to the doctor and asked for an Rx. It has helped a lot! It’s temporary (I hope), and for now it’s what I need. Good luck!

    Comment by Melissa — April 30, 2008 #

  39. Ack. I’m sorry. These are not fun times. Especially when your family is going through stuff as well. I hope things work out for all of you soon and whatever is happening settles down. Sending you lots of hugs!

    Comment by Marie — April 30, 2008 #

  40. I feel like a lot of people I know are dealing with major life issues right now. Do what you can for now. Take 5 minutes at work to walk outside. Go on a 15 minute walk sometime after you get home. Take these moments as times for yourself. Without phones, emails, text messages or people knocking at your door. Though it won’t completely resolve the world’s problems, it might bring you a few moments of peaceful silence. *hugs*

    Comment by Nilsa S. — April 30, 2008 #

  41. I feel you on the stressed feelings. I think we both need to remember to take time for ourselves and remember that everything will be ok in the end. Keep the cape in the garbage though…I know I’m trying to.

    The big comment box cracks me up. I’ve never seen one so big (that’s what she said!)

    Comment by tori — April 30, 2008 #

  42. Dude. Totally. I don’t know if it’s boy troubles or just being overworked to exhaustion, but I definitely have a case of the blues.

    Maybe it’s going around.

    Comment by Miss Adventurous — April 30, 2008 #

  43. “Your Life’s Work: Opening to Your Calling.” Sounds perfect! You gotta tell us about it afterwards. I know the feeling of being stuck in doing something not that fulfilling, while running out of energy to deal with all of life’s curves, but this sounds like a great start, and like you say we all have to learn to rescue ourselves. Good luck Sizz, sending positive vibes your way.

    Comment by Jen — May 2, 2008 #


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