I Am
June 30, 2010 at 6:19 am | Posted in light bulb moments, processing | 36 CommentsLast night somewhere after 10pm something shifted. Inside myself, a switch was flipped and a light came on. And I remembered one of my favorite quotes:
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” -Eleanor Roosevelt
I had spent the previous 24 hours feeling torn up about a situation that was not my fault even though the other party was doing their best to bully and guilt me into believing so. I had talked it over with trusted confidantes, my therapist, my bosses. I had listened to everyone else. . . but not to myself. And the moment I took action based on my own gut instincts, I felt better. It didn’t change the reality that I was in the middle of a shitty situation but what it did do is change how I perceived myself within that situation.
You get that? I changed my perception of myself.
I no longer felt afraid or like a victim. I shone my light on every single thing I was afraid could happen and was shocked to not feel paralyzed by my fear. Instead I remembered who I am. And I stood taller knowing that I have the power to define how I feel about myself. No one else.
And that, my friends, is no small feat.
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Where is the LIKE button on here? That’s fabulous!
Comment by Woman with Kids— June 30, 2010 #
Woo Hoo! Monumental!
Comment by Roxie— June 30, 2010 #
FUCK yea! It is so hard to turn off the bad talk and listen to the good talk in our heads.
Comment by hotpinksox— June 30, 2010 #
Cheering at the computer screen. I think you may have figured out the secret of life, right there. (Seriously. All hail Guru Sizzle. :)
Comment by Moose— June 30, 2010 #
Standing here, applauding. Go YOU.
Comment by Angella— June 30, 2010 #
Wahoo! :) I want a Like button, too! I’ve been struggling with something similar the last couple of days, so thank you for the fantastic reminder.
Comment by Sarah— June 30, 2010 #
Lol, moments like that are always great!
Comment by Evelyn— June 30, 2010 #
Awesome!
Comment by Melissa— June 30, 2010 #
Talk about a milestone. Awesome, Sizz!!! Hope the resolution you suggested brings you peace and harmony!
Comment by Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks— June 30, 2010 #
*proud* of you, my sista friend
xo
Comment by jenny 2 times— June 30, 2010 #
That is awesome. Not only did you change your perception, but you allowed that perception to dictate your actions. So crucial!
Comment by Jess— June 30, 2010 #
Totally high-fiving you from here. Hurrah!
Comment by Kerri Anne— June 30, 2010 #
That is just awesome. I’m over here smiling for you!
Comment by LesleyG— June 30, 2010 #
Think of how many ways you can wield that power now that you recognize how to get it.
Comment by Mel Heth— June 30, 2010 #
Food luck, girl! And way to go!!!!
Comment by Sally— June 30, 2010 #
hahaha I meant good luck, not food luck. Food luck is an awesome term, though.
Comment by Sally— June 30, 2010 #
My grandmother had a photo of Eleanor Roosevelt along with our family photos. Now I understand why.
Comment by Neil— June 30, 2010 #
Good for you. I’m getting to the point where I’m just too damn old to put up with crap. You know?
Comment by Isabel— June 30, 2010 #
Rah rah … so very proud of you Sizz :-). I still get a little ‘happy shudder’ whenever I read about you and Mr. Darcy … just makes me feel all gooey. It rocks!
Comment by Wendy— June 30, 2010 #
Neil pointed me here. Glad he did. I named my daughter Eleanor after Eleanor Roosevelt.
Keep standing tall!
Comment by Deer Baby— June 30, 2010 #
Most Excellent Dear Lady!!
Comment by Lynda— June 30, 2010 #
No small feat at all.
xo
Comment by Maggie, dammit— June 30, 2010 #
THAT . . . is the mountain we all strive to climb.
Comment by Mayberry Magpie— June 30, 2010 #
A big part of what happens to us in life is how we perceive things and let them affect us. I’m so so glad that you were able to do this because it’s HUGE step. I hope the situation is resolved soon and you can “shelf” it away.
Comment by Marie— June 30, 2010 #
i’m so glad you have finally figured out – you are good enough, smart enough and gosh, darn… people like me.
okay, so i’ve said this probably 5 times now but i mean it!
Comment by gorillabuns— June 30, 2010 #
That’s why they say to Follow Your Heart. It won;t lead you wrong. If you are honest with yourself, you will have automatic peace in your own skin. :-) I’m proud of you, for your leap. How difficult it is, to attain these epiphanies!! How liberating, when you do!!
Comment by Bully— July 1, 2010 #
I want a LOVE button. I’m stealing your attitude and will be applying it from this moment on. Thanks for being awesome!
Comment by freckledk— July 1, 2010 #
i love that quote and yay for you!
i love this one too from Buddhist monk, Brother Thay:
of course reality *is* unpleasant for those in really horrific situations, but for those of us trying to work through our fears, i think it applies.
and this:
it took me a long time understand what the heck he was talking about!
Comment by angela— July 1, 2010 #
I have often turned to that quotation when I felt defeated or unjustly persecuted. What a gift she left us in that one sentence.
Comment by Nina— July 1, 2010 #
Inspiring, Sizz. Way to handle a really tough situation and stay in your shoes.
Comment by LongStoryLonger— July 2, 2010 #
Sounds perfect.
can you show me how?
Comment by Nat— July 2, 2010 #
Thank you for this.
You have no idea how much I needed to read this right now. Last night, my sister asked me to babysit my nephew. I said no because I wasn’t sure how late work would go but anyway, I found out that she was asking me to babysit so that she could go hang out and drink with my other cousins. Imagine how hurtful it was to learn that they all made plans without me but thought I was good enough to babysit.
Needless to say, I refuse to be the victim here and hurt anymore. Thanks for reminding me that I am strong enough to handle my business and come out on top.
Comment by Hilly— July 3, 2010 #
Woot woot.
Comment by Meghan— July 3, 2010 #
Probably one of the truest things ever said by Eleanor. The only thing that I, or anyone, can have unequivocal control over is perception. That is, one’s own perception. If I perceive things to be going badly, then they are. If I perceive things to be going well, then they are. :-)
~~~
With Love and Gratitude,
The Intentional Sage
Comment by TheIntentionalSage— July 4, 2010 #
You inspire me!
Comment by 3jaysmom— July 9, 2010 #
After reading the last post I was going to send those positive vibes your way, but by reading this, I realized you don’t need them. You ARE the positive vibe. You rock Sizz!!!
Comment by Polín— July 25, 2010 #