I don’t know what to do.
I don’t want to sound ungrateful. Really! I have the most awesome, loving friends and family. I know how lucky I am. I do. I do. I’ve even had some super great boyfriends over the years. Even the closeted gay one who sent me three days of flowers on Valentine’s Day. Or the one who planned the romantic French picnic complete with handmade road signs in French to guide our way. Or the one who wrote me poems. And the other who sang me songs. Or the one who made me laugh so hard I spit out my drink, often. And that one who slow danced with me at the ocean, us drenched in the light from the headlight beams, swaying to the sounds of Frank Sinatra.
There has been romance and love and butterfly stomachs. And I appreciate it. And I miss it.
I’ve been trying diligently to be ready for the next big thing. I’ve read books and tested out theories and kissed a few frogs. I have made lists. I have debated the intricacies of your temperament, my temperament (we are both so fickle), the mind-boggle that is human communication . . . I even learned to sing Come Rain or Come Shine just in case the time would come when there would be someone worthy to sing it to.
Where is he?
I was just wondering if you have a plan? Do you have an outline you can send me? I need tips. Love tips from the master. I like to plan ahead and on this one, I keep coming up empty. It really is driving me a bit nuts.
And if you can’t help, can you send this over to Patience? She might have something to say about all this.