Formerly Me

Ten years ago, I looked like this (me, pictured in the middle). That seems like a lifetime ago.

  • It’s the me after an Oprah-inspired moment and a loss of 60 lbs.

  • It’s the me in a happy relationship with a great guy.

  • It’s the me after a bad dye job and a need to strip all the color from my hair (hence, blonde).

  • It’s the me who could shop in any store and have too many options of what to buy.

  • It’s the me who was told I resembled Sharon Stone.

  • It’s the me who was finishing college.

  • It’s the me who was working on her Senior project- a documentary entitled, “The Weight that Women Carry.”

  • It’s the me who didn’t have a clue what to do with male attention (now that I was thin).

  • It’s the me who was slightly obsessive about food and exercise.

  • It’s the me who felt full of possibility.

20 thoughts on “Formerly Me

  1. I like you as a brunette. But you’re hot, no matter which hair color you have!

  2. OMG – You blonde!!! Tori Spelling..HA!

    Its the you of the past…a you that doesn’t know as much or experienced as much as the you now!

  3. tori spelling! (puke) i just knew someone would say that. i used to get that a lot. my nose and breasts are real!

    ๐Ÿ˜‰ sizz

  4. Oh man, one of my friends found a college picture of me recently. I *did* look like a creepy weird doll in the photo. Tiny little body, and great big hair! ha ha!

  5. Who can know a woman
    Who can know her natural color
    – author unknown

    Yeah, I can see both a lil’ Tori and a lil’ Sharon in there ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. I think the Weight that Women Carry was more about the Expectations that were upon you, those days. IMO. To BE all those things, and not only deal with it, but that there was something wrong with you if you weren’t striking out for more.

    Maybe my voice is against what the others are saying, but I see a much more confident, self-actualized woman Now than I do in that piccie. You look Now like a person who has it together, and who feels good about herself. The person Then seems a little insecure, and out of place. The person you are Now has come a long way, has begun a new life and a new career in a new state…and as you have pointed out, has a great life.

    When I see pics of you Now, I can see why it is people like you so much, why you’d be popular. You have it all, including beauty. Maybe you are what you always dreamed you might be.

  7. I wouldn’t trade who I am now (at 30.9) for who I was/what I looked like 10 years ago. Don’t you feel sorry for college girls, with these huge expectations on their shoulders and no idea where they’re going? In your post you seem to miss those years, but I think you should be proud of who you are right now and what you’ve accomplished (including much better hairstyle choices!)

  8. I miss college. I loved everything about it. The constant learning and self discovery, the feeling that so much was new and all that hope, promise and potential.

    But now I love knowing who I am. Knowing my abilities as well as my limits. There’s been a lot of living in the past ten years, and I loved most of that too.

  9. Maybe this is the year of the blender: you can combine all the good stuff about you now and then, and become so fabulous that the rest of us will pale (even more) in your glowing light. ๐Ÿ™‚

  10. Are you telling me Tori’s boobs aren’t real? Say it ain’t so.

    Is the world much different, in your eyes, ten years later Ms. Sizzle?

  11. Wow, fun to look back, eh? Whenever I do, and I think about what I did and didn’t know, I realize that they were both a blessing, and a curse.
    For the record, I think you look like the woman you are, now. That’s what I like to believe about myself, 10 years later, as well.

  12. Looking back like that, it can give vertigo, eh? I have rarely dared that โ€œten yearโ€ memory exercize.

    You seem to miss it a bit, am I right?

    I would tend to think that the thirties are even more full of possibilities than anything before! I hope you get to feel those possibilities again. It’s a great feeling.

  13. Pls share your wisdom on what to do with all the male attention. I’ve managed to end my marriage and one relationship– and the though of the attention makes me want to vomit and gain all the weight back! (which is counter-productive, I know)

  14. I like the brunette Sizzle. I also like to think that life ebbs and flows. There’s always a time for hope and possibility, no matter what age we are. More ebbs than flows, please!!

    By the way, HI, I’ve been lurking for a year. Thought I’d finally make myself known.

    Sometimes I look at old pictures of myself and think, “Dang, I looked good/thin/tan/happy” but I still see or feel a little bit of pain I was hiding at the time.

  15. I was just dreaming about college last night — I have those dreams often. I loved that time. Interestingly, I also lost some weight in college and was my thinnest, but I didn’t gain any more attention. Do you now wish you were the person in the picture?

  16. wow…the memories just came flooding back…from that photo. we were so young… and so stuck in society’s mold of what women should look like.
    i am so grateful for you and your friendship…we have grown up in so many ways… to be able to write this speaks volumes.

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