Reach Out From the Inside

I woke up in a funk. I over-snoozed and after 45 minutes of being awake, I still don’t feel like myself. I was feeling so good all week and now this. Where did this mood come from?

It really bugs me when I can’t figure out the source of my bad mood. I know sometimes you have to just let time sort it out for you. I’ve been trying to embrace the Zen-ness of that but as a control-freak over-thinker, it’s no easy feat. Throw into that mix my impatience with myself and we’ve got a mess up in this mind of mine.

Any of these could be the reason or the combo pack of reasons why I’m all down in the dumper today:

-nostalgia

-stress

-work boredom

-ch-ch-changes on the horizon

-birth control messing with my emotional balance

-lack of exercise

-embarrassment over sharing TMI about my “O” situation in yesterday’s post

-trying to be a girlfriend after years of not being a girlfriend

-feeling disconnected from myself, my heart

-not enough sleep from staying up too late watching old episodes of Grey’s Anatomy

-over-attachment to blogging

-worry about a friend

This too shall pass, as they say. Right?

“Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity./Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be./But you’re on to me and all over me./You loved me ’cause I’m fragile./When I thought that I was strong./But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone. . .” – Gravity, Sara Bareilles

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45 thoughts on “Reach Out From the Inside

  1. It really gets to me when I dont know why I am not in a good mood.

    I think it happens from the culmination of a bunch of little things.

    Hope you feel better Sizzzzzz.

  2. Sorry to read that you’ve got the blues (not the Kraft mac-n-cheese kind either). Gawd that was corny, but I’m leaving it in anyway 😛 I understand what its like to be on a high and then quickly plummet and wonder “HTF did I GET here?”. I internalize so very much… *sigh*… anywho… keep your chin up, girlie and keep repeating “This too shall pass… This too shall pass…” Tight hugs from the Ohio Blog-Stalker

  3. I feel ya today…I’m in a funk, too. It sounds like you’ve got a lot on your plate, and are maybe feeling a little overwhelmed? But you’re right, “this to shall pass.”

  4. oooohhh…it’s amazing what you see when you actually click over to comment. PURTY page.

    Don’t worry about the over sharing on the O situation. We ALL have our own version of O situations.

    🙂

  5. I think it’s the time of year as much as anything. A colleague and I were talking yesterday about the fact that this past Monday is statisically the most likely day for people to call off work sick. The holidays are over by a month and it’s a long time before there’s another festive occasion. Between that and the cold and the lack of sun, it’s no wonder there’s a whole lot of “just not quite right-ness” going on.

  6. My Vote is vulnerability and embarrassment over exposure, yesterday. We love you, as-is. It’s okay.

    Get mad, punch a pillow, eat some chocolate diet pudding. .
    I don;t know anything else, but waiting it out. *hugs*

  7. i’ve learned to just let my bad days, come and go w/out too much worry because i know, they will be gone the next day… if the mood is not, however, that’s usually when i begin to wonder if something more serious is wrong… you listed a lot of things that could contribute to your mood but i can make you feel better on at least one of them… i, too, have only had one big ‘o’ in my life and it was with a guy i didn’t even want to be with (plus he was 5-years younger than me)… i’ve had many’a guy try but i’m just not built that way, such is life…

    cheer up! it’s friday! :o)

  8. I say, embrace feeling crappy, wallow a bit, and then you’ll really get over it. Sometimes, you really do just wake up on the wrong side of the bed!

  9. For me, not enough sleep is usually the culprit of many other bad things/feelings/emotions. A good nap or good night’s sleep helps a lot.

    Don’t be embarrased by the O sitch. We’re not here to judge.

    I hope you get through it quickly and enjoy your weekend!

  10. ‘Friday funk-its’ is a feeling I get when the week of work is almost over and I can get back to doing stuff I want to do.

    And yeah, I’m gonna say what everyone else says about your ‘O’ comment, but not because I am feeling like a conformist. It’s NEVER TMI sizz…never at all, ever. I don’t think there’s anything you could say to stop me from reading your blog~so there, you’re stuck with all of us stalkers. Deal!

  11. We’re all entitled to our bad moods I think. Especially the b.c. hormones can really screw with you, that’s why I stopped taking them. I was on depo provera and after a while, it totally killed my libido and made me an anxious beast.

  12. I agree with Scotty – it’s all these little things that build up. For me, it is usually the whole day or a large chunk of it. I isolate myself as much as possible, then do something relaxing AS SOON as I get home!

  13. I have a friend that when this happens we call each other and giggle and then start yelling “PEP….PEP….gotta get your PEP”. It is really hard to not crack up, tell your friend they are crazy and hang up the phone smiling.

    Ahem….Sizzle…PEP…PEP….gotta get your PEP!!!!

    I’m smiling, I hope you are…maybe a little??

  14. i have this theory that birth-control pills make you randomly glum for no reason. i hate it when it happens. and it happens every single month – and not just once sometimes!

    i hope you feel better soon *hugs*

  15. Awwww, Sizzle. At least these are very normal stressers, which too will pass. Sounds like you need a weekend where you can sleep in, slouch around and do what suits Sizzle best. Good thing it’s a Friday!

  16. I think it’s the January’s.

    The weather’s kinda crappy, you want something better to come along, no one is getting out and about enough, etc., etc., etc.

    At least, that’s what I’m blaming it on 🙂

  17. I think today’s theme is oversleeping as I did the same today. Perhaps I was avoiding going into work as I knew it would be absolutely crazy today. It always is when it rains. *sigh*

  18. I agree with Princess Ex–that this is going around. Sizzle, sounds as though you have a little extra stress hanging over you and the winter doldrums. Hope both will be over soon for you.

  19. As fun as nostalgia can usually be, it can truly fuck you up. I know from firsthand experience. I hope you figure out whatever is bugging you and squash the everloving crap out of it. A depressed Sizz is no fun!

  20. I have a refrigerator magnet of a slightly crazed but perfectly coiffed housewife that says “Being bitchy and unpredictable is all part of my charm.”

    I live that!

    Honestly, sizzle, if we knew why we had bad moods, we wouldn’t have them.

    And, how would we ever recognize a good mood?

    Go with the bad, hon. Let it wash over you, have a mini-pity party, scream at somebody, then move on.

    Works for me.

  21. I woke up feeling ultra crappy this morning, and now I’ve got a sore throat so I think I’m coming down with something.

    Hope you feel better soon! At least it’s the weekend.

  22. No worries. It makes me feel better when people share things. I feel like I overshare most of the time. (FYI, I didn’t think you were oversharing. Why is it awkward to say anything about that? No matter what I type, it feels like the wrong thing. Gah. You know what I mean.)

    The Januaries are going strong. And I also empathize about the “getting used to being a girlfriend” thing. Isn’t it crazy how that can cause a major identity crisis, even though you wouldn’t have it any other way? Weird.

  23. Over-attachment to blogging? That exists? Oh great. A big HUG to you, my friend. May the weekend bring calm. 🙂

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