Gripes

  • Conference calls where you don’t shut your office door (I don’t need to listen to you talk to the help desk again.)
  • Low talkers (what did you say!? I cannot hear you.)
  • Printing documents but leaving them in the printer pick up for days on end (until I finally recycle them out of annoyance)
  • Rambling voice mails (just get to the point already)
  • Cubicles
  • Filing (any kind)
  • People who drop by unannounced and expect me to drop everything to serve them
  • Lower case emails at work
  • Flakes (Show up or at least call/email to give a sad sack of an excuse.)
  • Voice mails where the caller forgets to leave a call back number
  • Voice mails where the caller says their number so fast you have to hit repeat 5 times to piece it together
  • Loud talkers (I’m in a cubicle remember?)
  • Leaving the break room kitchen sponge soaking wet in the sink (Just, ew.)
  • Not washing your hands after using the restroom (At least pretend to wash them by dipping them in the water when someone else is in the public restroom with you. Gah!)
  • Wearing so much perfume/cologne that I can always tell where you have been moments (hours?) before (I don’t like choking on your scent when I enter the elevator.)

What are your workplace gripes?

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74 thoughts on “Gripes

  1. He who shall remain nameless (ahem, my boss), is a not only a talk on the cell phone while going to the bathroom person, but also a not washing your hands afterwards and then digging into the communcal food with said unwashed hands person. ACK.

  2. I think you just listed every single one of my gripes perfectly. And scarily.

    On a good note – I just got a recognition (thank you) award for my last drop-everything-to-serve-someone-at-the-last-minute request. yay!

  3. That about sums up my office gripes too, especially the dropping by unannounced. Oh, there’s also the “I’m going to be sweet as pie to you and then trash talk you behind your back” beeyotch that happens to be my mangler. Bah!

  4. My coworkers have been taking tabloid magazines into the women’s restroom and leaving them on the back of the toilet.

    And they don’t always flush completely.

    Gossip. I hate the workplace gossip.

    Even worse is the workplace backstabbing, which seems to happen all the time. One minute someone is in total agreement with you, the next second they never liked that idea to begin with. Grow up.

  5. I must admit to being someone who leaves long, rambling voicemails… However, all the rest? Yes! Sooooo annoying! (And the voicemails? I’m sure they’re annoying too, I just refuse to admit it since I’m the culprit)

  6. oh! and a coworker with the most annoying ring tones and text alerts who just so happens to be VERY popular so her damn phone is going off every few minutes.

    ugh.

  7. Oh, the printers. I am constantly delivering papers to people because they don’t remember to pick them up. I guess I think since I do that for them, they’ll remember to go check more often, but it’s not working.

    I have a co-worker who never clears her missed call beeps on her cell phone. That phone beeps ALL day long.

  8. Ooo, I LOVE griping about the office! Especially since I design offices as part of my job.

    Related to your 6th point, I hate it when my boss starts talking to me about work stuff before I have even taken my coat off or put my lunch in the fridge. Give me a frickin’ break! Can I at least take off my coat before you jump me with requests?

    And I hate that my office won’t provide the supplies we need – trace paper, colored pencils, pens, etc. Cheapskates.

  9. I know I don’t physically work IN an office, but I still have a couple of gripes.
    Rudeness: I hate, hate, HATE when I reach out to someone with a question or issue and their response is just “I don’t have time to deal with this, ask X” (or call x, or do x) Would it kill you to say “SORRY, I’m really busy at the moment but I wish I could help”???
    Passive Aggressiveness: Do I really need to explain? I think I’ve dealt with it on every job ever. Blegh.

  10. I can take your conference calls gripe up a notch … I used to sit in a cubicle one row away from the marketing folks (also in cubes). One day, two of them gathered in one cube and had a conference call. On speakerphone.

  11. Oh, I forgot! Someone keeps switching my phone cord with a tangled up one! I DO NOT TWIST MY PHONE CORD! Quit switching your crappy one with my nice one! I think the IT guy is doing it because he dislikes me. The feeling is mutual.

    I could go on forever about our worthless IT guy.

  12. I hate that one of the guys in the office doesn’t change out the coffee. He just pours more water through the same, already used grounds. Dude, it’s free coffee… go ahead and put a new bag in.

    Also same co-worker who gets hot so he turns the heat off and the air on. Instead of just turning the heat off. Like I want to feel the air conditioner on me when it’s 40 degrees outside.

    I hate getting voicemails that say “do not call this number again or I will you!!!” and then they don’t tell me who they are or what phone number they are calling from. I’m like ok… well thanks for being an idiot.

    I also hate that one of my co-workers says hows come instead of how come. And he always wants to talk my ear off about American Idol. Every damn year. So this year I’ve decided not to even watch American Idol. Or if I do watch it I’m waiting till the final 12 get picked and then I’m not telling him I’m watching.

  13. People stopping to talk just because my cube faces the kitchen and so there are always people coming by. Also, the coffee addicts who gather in the kitchen in the morning and talk loudly for ages while they wait for the coffee to be ready.

    Also, I am so with you on the lower case emails at work. I type in lower case when I’m on gchat or whatever, but never ever at work. Also, don’t use “u” or any other text-message lingo in professional emails.

  14. I swear I was going to rant about this. I am placing a call to the CEO (he who signs the pay cheques) to confirm an urgent last minutes appointment and I still need to get together all the files.
    Then she walks in — points to a poster I am sure I edited last year. And says:
    “Does the apostrophe go here?”
    “What? I’m busy right now leave it with me. I’ll get back to you.” (Because she just doesn’t want to know where the apostrophe goes, she wants to discuss the finer points of grammar, and I need to look it up. It’s one of those weird sentence structures.)
    “But does the apostrophe, go here?”
    “I’m on the phone with the CEO’s office. Leave it with me I will look at it when I’m done.”
    “But I need… ”
    “LISTEN! I am in the midst of something that needs to be done right now! Now if you would like to go explain to Jack why your apostrophe is more important than what I am doing for him. Please feel free to discuss with him. ”

    This pisses me off because she always does this, and expects me to jump. And she should just look it up herself. There are so many resources on the internet. Grrrrr!

    Probably should have blogged out this myself. OH well…

  15. oh! and building mates who “create” a parking space where there isn’t one thus making it impossible to get out of the parking garage without doing a 12 point turn thing with my car.

    that is not a space.

    go park outside you jerkface.

  16. Rude people. Rude people. Rude people.

    Having someone call you to announce that Mr. So and So is on the line please hold. I mean what is that? Who is so important that they can’t make their own calls? And why aren’t they actually on the line?

    Rude People.

  17. re: the printer.

    People who, when they refill the printer, don’t put the entire ream of paper in it. It is made to hold an entire ream! When you only put half, someone has to refill it twice to your once. Come on now.

  18. I also hate the phone calls with the door open thing – don’t you have your own office so your calls can be PRIVATE, we don’t have to hear everything going on in your life! And I hate people who phone in sick constantly with “stress” when you know they’re still getting sick pay yet are spending their days off going for interviews!

  19. my gripes would be:

    1. not replacing the water jug when it’s empty
    2. not replacing the paper towels when they’re gone
    3. drinking the last cup’o coffee and not making a new pot
    4. people that use speaker phone for conference calls – HELLO!
    5. people that steal your frozen lunch out of the freezer and never replace it

    i’m sure they’re more, just can’t think of them right now…

  20. So I guess you like medium talkers :o)

    I HATE the corn nut guy that sits in the cube next to me. LOUD and Smelly snacks should not be allowed in the work place.

    I hate people that plaster their cubes with awards or class completion certificates, we DON’T CARE.

    Who cooks fish in the community microwave? WTF is wrong with people?

    Co-workers that wear headphones and blast their music so loud you have to scare the shit out them to ask a question.

    Wow, I’m a little cranky today…

  21. apparently you and i work at the same place and have the exact same list. lol.

    worst, though, is loud talkers. Y’know it’s too loud when you can’t have your OWN phone conversation cuz you can’t hear over theirs.

  22. Ok, time to come out of the lurker closet hehe

    All of yours plus…

    – stop reading my screen over my shoulder! especially if i don’t know your there! (btw sizzle, everyone knows you here because they read your blog over my shoulder! lol)

    – sending an email with EVERYONE AND THEIR MOM listed in the To: field! hello people! i don’t need to see a list of 400 email addresses! use the Bcc: field please my gosh

    – and while i’m on the subject of emails, having the most annoying purple/pink/orange background emails! ok, what in the world were you thinking when you picked that!?!? i’m a dude and i can pick better colors than that…

    – asking me to do something 5 minutes before i leave when you had the whole day to tell me! i have a life ya know!

    – not documenting things at work that only you know. um, how in the world am i supposed to know that the X thing you do on Z day hooked into the N thingy at the R at ABC time blah blah blah! document people!

    – talking in the bathroom while i’m doing my thing. guys do not like to talk in the bathroom while they are doing their thing!!! especially about work, i need breaks ya know!

    – gossip is bad. lets put an end to it please

    – spelling mistakes and typos. fyi, God invented something called a spell check and grammar check for those of us who are grammatically challenged. use it!

    – asking me to work on the weekend because you know i’m single. yes, i’m single!! but that doesn’t mean i want to spend my free time fixing something you broke on the weekend.

    – the aweful smell in the breakroom. ok who in the world is heating up roadkill in the microwave!?!? and why can’t you smell it either??

    – no utensils in the breakroom. it can’t be that hard to keep a stockpile. i prefer not to eat my food with my hands thank you very much

    wow, that felt good! what a release! πŸ™‚

  23. Wow, Sizzle – you did a pretty good job of covering all of my gripes! I think my biggest gripe is the guy in the cube next to me who is a loud talker – get him on the phone and you could be in the business next door and still hear him!

  24. oh! and i must add (this just in!) people who ask me to bend over backwards for them after i have already pretzeled myself for them and then have the NERVE to roll their eyes and act all pissy when i tell them they will have to take care of their own problem themselves.

    did you just roll your eyes at me!?

    grow up.

    and also? fuck off you turd.

    (i am really really snarky and pissy today. i have zero tolerance for asshattery!)

  25. Now that I work out of the home these are a moot point but until recently:

    Co-workers who think what they are doing is more important than what I am doing.

    Building mates who pee on toilet seats.

    The overpriced food/drinks and slow service at the only food place in the building.

    Constantly being asked technology questions and help with fixing printer/ computer, etc. because I am the only one who knows how to turn on a computer.

    Always being frozen in the airconditioning even when it is 85 degrees outside.

  26. – when co-workers turn the TV so loud that the Backyardigans drown out Miles Davis

    – interrupting me every 5 minutes to “see what else I’ve built”

    – having to put on pants if Fed Ex shows up

    – the coffee in the French Press gets cold

    – running out of beer by 3pm

    – having to pay for a full porno when I only need to watch about 10 minutes of it

    – co-workers that need to have their diaper changed an hour after I changed the last one

    – when it’s so cold outside that I can’t lock co-workers in the backyard while I get my work done

    I think that’s about it.

  27. I’m so glad I came back to read the comments – they cracked me up, and I needed that. Here’s to a life where we end up working with the best people ever.

  28. Ok, this day is getting better by the minute haha

    Part 2

    – i don’t want to hear about how drunk you got last night and made it home somehow, though you have no clue how that happened. thats just stupid. grow up and act responsibly

    – ask me to sit in on a meeting for you about something i have no clue about and expect me to answer questions. uh dude, that is just wrong! i probably won’t give the right answer and i will look stupid doing it!

    – debug your code. first off, thats not code, its gibberish. you don’t comment, you don’t tab, its a mess! clean it up, you will probably figure out the mistake yourself

    – competition. look, we are on the same team. that means we work together. capiche?

    – sucking up to the manager/boss/vp. he knows your sucking up. its not working dude!

    – eating other people’s candy. that candy is mine! if you want some, just ask. but don’t steal it while i’m not at my desk! i know who takes it!

    – clipping finger nails at your desk. ok, this is huge. your desk is not a place to address your personal hygiene issues. i don’t want nails flying onto my keyboard, or anywhere near me for that matter!

    – cursing at the computer. has that EVER done any good?!?! banging it, shoving it, hitting it doesn’t help either

    great post sizzle!!

  29. 1. Coffee stains. I hate seeing coffee stains on desk tops and applicant files.
    2. This is a job! You are a grown up. Stop your mom, grandma, uncle, gf/bf call asking over YOUR status! It’s not sweet, it’s annoying.
    3. Just because I’m single does not mean I need or want to get asked out. If I told you NO months ago then I will most than likely keep turning you down. If, IF, I change my mind it’s because I started to feel sorry for you.
    4. I don’t consider all of you my friends so stop thinking we are.
    5. Flush twice. If you sprinkle when you tinkle be a sweetie and wipe the seatie! I can’t believe women can be that dirty. Look back. It won’t hurt you.
    6. My cube/office is not a counseling center. I don’t mind listening to your story, but if you aren’t willing to take my advice then stop coming to me.
    7. If you constantly complain about your weight then do something about it. Don’t ask me to help you and then go off and eat fries. I will be on your butt but you gotta keep practicing self control.
    8. I know your child is cute. I like kids. But I don’t have to see the kid’s every pose. Also, I’m ok with giggles but putting the kid on the phone for me to listen is a little too much.
    9. You have an office. Meet in there, not around my cube.
    10. I like music. I have it on all the time but that doesn’t mean you come bring me all your cd collection for me to hear. Listen to it yourself.
    11. If I’m walking alone or standing in an elevator, it doesn’t mean I need to be talked to. I’m not lonely.
    12. I have one chair in my office. That means one person at a time.
    13. Do not, I repeat do not come behind my desk. There is no need for you on this side.
    14. Spell check. Typos are ok in IM’s but NOT in work emails.
    15. If you print something. Pick it up. If it comes in my stack, I probably won’t hunt you down to give it to you.
    16. Answer your office phone. Stop sending it to VM during work hours.

    Wow…now I can breathe and relax.

  30. Close talkers. That’s the one that drives me nuts. People who feel that the closer they stand to me when they talk, the closer we must be as friends. I don’t like that one. At. All.

    Or people who put their hands in their skirt and pull up their pantyhose in front of me. But, that’s more of a general gripe, than just a workplace one.

  31. When someone is asking me to wipe their butt every hour.
    When I can’t go to the bathroom in peace.
    When on a conference call, screaming and fighting ensue to dangerous levels.

  32. Close talkers is a bad one. Especially when they have coffee breath. I tend to hold my breath when people come that close to me. Gross.

    Hug me on my birthday, maybe. But don’t hug me on other days. And do not kiss my cheek. We are at work, you are a coworker, not my best bud.

  33. Oh boy where to start! I think most of mine were covered in the earlier comments but I will add a few, and I work in a totally open plan office, me and 15 guys, we got a new girl recently but she works right at the other end of the office…

    The guy who sits beside me burps ALL the time, it’s disgusting!

    We like music on in our office, but please check it’s something the rest of us may want to hear – no Icelandic throat singing!

    Don’t act like my job isn’t important when I’ve saved more arses than you’ve had hot dinners.

    The kitchen stinks after you heat up a curry in the microwave – I’m not putting my freshly home made soup in there now!

    If I leave a clear and concise voicemail, do me a favour and call me back sometime in the same millenium! I’ve wasted most of day waiting for people to call me back!!

    Deeeeeeeeep breath…ahhhhh…all better now thanks!

  34. My office gripes…geez, where the hell do I start?

    – Corporate heads that still don’t use ‘their’, ‘there’, and ‘they’re’ in proper context.
    – Corporate heads that don’t take the time out of their day to meet the worker bees.
    – Email threads that last forever because everyone’s hitting ‘reply to all’ in response.
    – Customers telling me their educational background without me asking. ‘Yes, I graduated from Purdue…that means you’re supposed to quiver with fear and awe when I speak…bitch.’
    – Those stupid corporate motivational pictures with something inspirational written it. (give me demotivators anyday!)
    – Interdepartmental cold transfers (‘What do you mean you’ve been transferred 5 times in the last 10 minutes???’)

    I’m sure there’s a lot more I’m missing here. Oh well, you get the idea.

  35. even though i’m just a mom right now (and because i am too “overqualified” for apparently ANY job, but thats another gripe) i relate to alot of these!
    the thing that annoys me the most is people who just don’t want to work. they go through all the effort to interview, get hired, wake up every morning, get dressed, drive in, get coffee, etc. etc. but when they are actually required to DO something work related (that they get PAID for), it just becomes too much for them to handle. hello people!! f-ing work! your not here to look pretty and take up space. it’s even worse when they complain to you like your on the same page or something. excuse me, we are NOT the same person. i thrive on being busy, and to makes the day go by faster! UGH! i guess that’s why i was the boss. **sigh** i miss working =)

  36. I also hate when office policies change for no apparent reason and all of the sudden there a signs up that say not to have sex in the stairwell during business hours.

  37. People who clutter my Inbox by hitting “reply all” when a private reply would do.

    Smiley faces and more than one exclamation point in business correspondence!!!!! 😑

  38. I don’t have a “work” so I don’t have any gripes, but I had to laugh about the saying the phone number too fast thing. My husband makes fun of me because I repeat it several times in any message I leave. I should point him over here and show him that people appreciate that.

  39. People who want things yesterday but waited until today to tell me. Hello? You are NOT my life.

    And, for that matter, them thinking they pay me enough to work like a dog and miss out on any of my life to be here. Pah ha!

    Timely post. πŸ™‚

  40. This sound like fun. Let’s see what I can come up with:

    1) I realize that I was hired to, essentially, do tasks that prevent you from doing your “real work.” However, because you hired me to do these tasks, these have become my “real work,” as it were. If I need information from you to do my work, doesn’t make sense to try to get me what I need? If not, then let’s not b*tch about how long it takes me to do my job, when you block me from doing my work through inaction.

    2) Some of the work that I do is time-sensitive. Thus, when I need information from you about a time-sensitive project, I’ll be sure to tell you that it’s time-sensitive, and thus needs to be addressed in a timely manner. Having to bodily chase you down to get a two word answer to a five sentence question does nothing to improve my mood or impression of you. Let’s use email or the telephone, shall we? I’ve heard it saves time.

    3) I’d really like it if you decided to not take a two hour lunch right when you’re done with your part of the larger, team-wide puzzle. Just because you’re finished doesn’t mean the rest of us are. Keep this in mind while your turning off your cellphone so that your lunch with your spouse/lover/BBF/potential new employer/hired hit man across town isn’t interrupted.

  41. I think you’ve hit a nerve!! My biggest gripe (among about a billion of them) is the need to put in “face time.” If I’m getting my work done efficiently and you’re happy with my work-product, is there a reason why I can’t go home at 5pm? I hate office politics!

  42. I work in a school…A happy place with basically well-educated, good people. Ok, to be honest, the well-educated people make me happy. The uneducated imbeciles who tend to believe they are in charge make me very unhappy. I am especially unhappy when these people think they need to edit my reports. Can I get a WHOO HOO for the English major whose reports are “edited” by people who consider “ain’t” proper grammar, don’t seem to think that grammar applies to emails (HATE to consider what the professional correspondence looks like), and for some reason think that juvenile backgrounds and borders have any place in work emails?

    Whoa…Latent bitterness rears its ugly head.

    Loud talkers, soft talkers, close talkers…They all aggravate me to no end. Is it that hard to use situationally appropriate conversation skills?

    Office managers: PISS ME OFF. I have worked with three. Number one was an unmedicated bipolar who drove me to actually yell — loudly — in a meeting. Number two was a hugger (which has no place in the professional world). She also only wore jogging shorts and athletic t-shirts dressed up with brooches — WTF? Number three (current) is a trashy hag who hates me for no apparent reason. Won’t even make eye contact. B*tchy when I need something within the requirements of my position. Ugh.

    And I am finished. Thanks.

  43. People that hover around without having anything to say/ask/do.
    People that talk on cell phones loudly just so everyone else around them can hear what they are saying
    Mouthbreathers on the phone
    Dear God – And every other one mentioned above!!!

  44. People who leave a message without a name or number – thinking I’ll just recognize their voice.
    People who can not find the garbage can in the kitchen and leave stuff on the counter.
    Just because you are a VP does not mean I’m your servant, maid, wife, fill in blank.
    UPPERCASE emails. Give me a break people – how old are you again??

  45. All of what you said (especially the vm ones!) plus:

    We have a unisex bathroom at work, and yes, I realize I am one of 3 females, but really? Put the toilet seat down ok? I wasn’t paying attention yesterday and slammed my ass down on the ceramic bowl. And I don’t want to think about ewwwww how dirty it was.

    People who don’t do their job right the first time and expect everyone else to pick up their slack.

    Unprofessional receptionists. You are the first impression people get when they come in, don’t be hollering down the hall at people, listening to your headphones, so zoned out you don’t notice people are standing in front of you.

  46. Uh oh..you got me started…

    The ‘fidgeter’: the co-worker who comes into my office–whether it be business-related or otherwise–and can’t help but touch my stuff..Stop touching my stuff!..probably doesn’t wash his hands after going to the bathroom either.

    Similar to the ‘figiter’ is the screen-toucher: pleeeease don’t touch my monitor. I reeealy don’t want to stare at your fingerprints all day.

    The loud eater: lick, smack, munch, gulp, gurgle… don’t think i won’t vomit on you mr. loud eater.

    The child: Expects that somebody else will clean up after him/her.

    The non-reuser/recycler: That Kirkland Signature bottled water originally came from a filtered tap, there’s no reason why you can’t just refill it. Not going to refill it? There are two ‘trash’ cans for a reason.

    The ‘multi-tasker’: That guy that tries to do my job for me. Don’t try to do my job. you’re not good at my job. I’m good at my job. You do your job. Don’t like your job? Quit.

    The Odorant: Anybody I can smell from a ‘professional’ distance. Too much cologne/perfume, whatever he/she had for dinner last night, BO, moth balls, hamster cage, fart..whatever. If you smell like anything other than nothing, you stink. Respect the fact that you work around other people all day.

    wow…that was surprisingly therapeutic. Thanks Sizzle.

  47. Being told that you must fulfill a promise made by someone else to a client that is. literally, impossible to do usually due to budgetary or technological constraints. But the promise is made anyway.

  48. AMEN to that! I agree 100%!
    Also, I would like to add … people who slam doors or drawers. Like my office door, public office drawers …etc.

    AND! loud co-workers with a heavy accent interupting you on an important phone call. EEEKKKK!

  49. People who leave a voice mail without a name and number. Like I recognize your voice, I have 60+ employees.
    Assistant Managers who ask for work and then go around telling the whole office how behind you are and how you are doing all my work. Stop fucking asking for it if you don’t want it. I am taking it away now.
    People who don’t do their dishes and leave them for the office assistant. Stop. She is not your mother.
    People who talk to you while you are on the phone. Especially if it is a really important call.
    People who come in and dump a whole bunch of crap on my desk. (So this part is my job, but it still annoys the piss out of me)

  50. -People who have conversations on their Nextel direct connect for all to here.
    -People who use the bathroom for washing or rinsing their dishes (wtf?).
    -People who trim or groom their nails, hair, and what not in close proximity to other employees (no i wasn’t going to eat that danish).
    -People who believe that because the company has a cleaning service come in at night. Some of us should suffer their filth all day long.
    -People who decorate their cubicle until it tumbles over the partition on to my side (wow I didn’t know grown ups set up shrines to beanie babies).
    -People who make 50,000+ printing up signs saying “I’m working here until a good fast food position opens up”.

    Sorry for the rant

    Carry on!

  51. My biggest workplace gripe was working with catty women. Behaving in unprofessional, backstabbing ways not only demeans women, but gives us a bad name in the workplace.

    I also hate it when I ask someone how they are and they respond with a day of the week. Ie. “Well, it’s (insert day of the week here).” How hard is to say “fine”?

  52. Thank god my boss lives two states away or I’d have a really long list. But you know how you hate those rambling voice mails? I am greatly perturbed when the boss calls me and leaves a message stating that he has a question and please call him. I call him. He cannot remember question. So he starts asking questions of a non- work nature like how was my weekend.

    AUGH!!!!!!

  53. ….having annoying coworkers follow me into the bathroom and thinking the rules are off and start talking to me like we’re best friends. Um, if I ignore you on purpose on the “floor” I will never talk to you with my pants down.

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