Best Face Forward

Some days I find it easier to occupy space in the world. Usually this has everything to do with my attitude but some days the credit goes to something I am wearing. It could be a shiny new pair of kitten heeled shoes, or a pair of dark wash jeans that fit just right, a snazzyred lips jacket with the perfect cut for my body or, like yesterday, ruby red lipstick.

There’s something about red lips that make me feel saucy. Like a vixen. Like all I’d have to do is smile with my ruby red lips and anything is possible. Of course, I am completely off my rocker thinking that but who cares? As long as the sexiness I feel from applying that lipstick permeates my attitude, I’m golden. Because sex appeal has way more to do with attitude than it does with actual looks.

That reminds me of The Four C’s. I’ve posted them before– long-time readers will remember them. Clarity. Confidence. Color. Cleavage. Let’s review, shall we?

Clarity: You must first be clear with yourself about your intent. Are you looking to shag or to find a meaningfully deep emotional connection? Do you have certain absolutes that would rule a potential suitor out of the game? Think these things through now, not after you are weeks into a relationship. Clarity counts for a lot in the pursuit of love.

Confidence: The motto being- “Fake it ’til you make it.” If you don’t have confidence, act as though you do. It will keep you on the right path. Begin by being positive. Believe you are worthy. Exude it. None of this coy crap. Love who you are and share it with your suitor. Find the balance between bragging and sharing your strengths. Confidence is sexy.

Color: Too many girls fall victim to the “black is slimming” mentality. Maybe that illusion works on some but do you really want to blend into the night? Do you really want to look like the last three girls he dated? No! Wear some color damn it. Red. Purple. Turquoise. Don’t be afraid to be seen. Express your unique self.

Cleavage: If you’ve got it, flaunt it. Just don’t let it all hang out so there is nothing left for the boy’s imagination. If you are less endowed, no worries. Two words: Wonder. Bra. If you don’t feel comfortable with baring your rack, work another asset. Like your legs? Great! Wear a skirt. Love your arms? Great! Sleeveless tops are your new best friend. Whatever you do, embrace the body you are in and play up your winning attributes. No man likes to hear a girl go on and on about how fat and/or ugly she is. Remember confidence? Work it.

As I’ve posted before, I originally came up with these to help a friend who was newly crushing on a guy (who also happened to be a friend of mine). She’d only been in one (long term, unhealthy) relationship before that and was feeling rather clueless about how to proceed. After we worked her through The Four C’s, she and that guy started dating. Then they moved into together. They’ve now been married for over a year.

While I am not responsible for them falling in love and getting married, I’d like to think that The Four C’s played a role in helping her gain the confidence she needed to pursue him and believe in herself.

Believing in ourselves. It’s the simplest idea and yet the hardest to put into practice.

Tell me, what’s the asset you flaunt?

“And I might let you off easy/Yeah I might lead you on/I might wait for you to look for me/And then I might be gone/There’s where I come from and/Where I’m going/And I am lost in between/I might go up to that phone booth/And leave a veiled invitation/On your machine . . .” -Shy, Ani Di Franco

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37 thoughts on “Best Face Forward

  1. thank… god… for… wonder… bras… ;o)

    i would say my best assets would be my eyes and my laugh – hard to change either since they are ‘part’ of me… :o)

  2. I wish I knew how to apply eyeshadow with more skill than I had in grade 9. I love my eyes: the size, the colour, etc, but they hide behind glasses. And when I put on the eyeshadow, it looks like my imaginary kid sister did it. Argh.
    As for the rest of the 4 Cs, I already practice most of them. J buys me red clothes because he knows they’re my colour 🙂 I’m thinking having gotten married, the clarity of dressing may not be over, but communitcated. As for cleavage, the best advice to all girls is go get sized! A proper fitting bra is a godsend!!!

  3. I love me the red lipstick too. My mother has always told me, if you are feeling shitty, put on some pretty lipstick and leave the house. I totally agree.
    So yeah, shiny pretty glossy lipstick to show off my perky, pillowy pucker. 🙂

  4. Love the 4 Cs, thanks!
    I don’t like to flaunt all that much, but I have found a big heartfelt smile will do wonders for me and grabs a lot of attention. Cleavage, of course, but I feel more comfortable with smiles.

  5. I need to remember the Four C’S. I think clarity is the most important, thanks for making that number 1. I have been trying to keep things honest which helps me to stay clear.

    My best asset is my cleavage.

  6. Love me the 4 C’s… I flaunt my hair by keeping it hip and young…even when I don’t feel that way. A great pedi and some open toed shoes always helps me in the confidence arena.

  7. I’ve heard that women usually adhere so a specific rule about cleavage and legs.

    You can show one or the other, but never both at the same time.

  8. I am printing this out and taping it to my bathroom mirror.
    I needed this Sizzle, thanks 🙂

    As for what I flaunt…the boobs. Even after a kid and the fact I’m sliding into 40 very fast – they are as Rhino says “spectatcular.”

  9. Those are fantastic, but I have to admit that I do think there should be a “cut-off mark” as far as cleavage at work. too much is distracting, even for me:) One benefit to being brown-haired/brown-eyed is that we can pull off that red lipstick. I always get compliments when I wear it b/c I think the key is also not wearing it too bright.

  10. Lovin’ your blog. Yes yes yes, fake it ’til you make it … everyone, I mean everyone thinks I’m so confident, but in reality, my knees start shaking when I have to walk past a group of people, I get sweaty palms when I meet new people and for goodness sake, I’m over 40 already. I feel awkward and like I’m 13 again. So yeah, I fake it. My only issue with baring the ‘rack’, is that men seriously can’t find my face!!!! Grrrrrr!! I saw a T-shirt here with arrows pointing up and it says ‘my face is here’ … was going to buy it. At least the bf thinks my eyes are so stunning he doesn’t start down all the time!

    On your previous post about addiction, we lost my Dad in 2004 – he never tried rehab and never expected him to, but it was his comfort and solace, sad that life dealt him what he couldn’t handle :-(. It’s rough and people who have no dealt with it really don’t seem to get it.

    Hope you have a stunning weekend … my lips sadly are way too thin to wear red on … but I think my eyes are one of my best assets, after the rack that is 🙂 but that may well be a matter of opinion.

  11. I am so jealous of that red lipstick – it looks STUNNING on you!
    Sadly I don’t have much in the way of cleavage to flaunt, but I do have very long blonde hair and I swish it about constantly – I’m a real-life “Samson”, I would lose all my powers if my hair was cut ;o)

  12. People, strangers even, have commented on my “radiance.”

    I’m 46, so it’s not youthful radiance.

    Which is a good thing–that means it comes from within and time can’t take it from me.

  13. lips eyes hair and cleavage, which generally stays neatly tucked in because of where I work.

    I always feel better when I put on makeup, but never do because I’m always late and work in social services. Might be pulling out the lipstick.

  14. Wow, that’s really excellent advice. I mean, from the guy POV, let me just say that yes, if a girl is constantly whining about how unattractive she is or whatever it may be, we might just start to believe it ourselves 🙂

    My best asset, I think, is my eyes. Or are my eyes. Whichever. Well, really, the veins in my arms. But I can’t voluntarily bring them out. They just have their days.

  15. Well, I’ve got three of the C’s down but I have no idea what my best asset is! My charming personality? My legs (even though I rarely bare them?) It’s definitely not my cleavage. 🙂

    I love your red lipstick. If only I could find the perfect shade for me…

  16. I love red lipstick, but it only accentuates how age-shrunken my lips are. And I’ve yet to find a “plumper” that really helps. Plus, most shades of red make my teeth look yellow, even though they’re not.

    I love the Four Cs, though!

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