I wanted to participate in Snackie’s Self-Love Day but also wanted to talk about The Fella because it’s the first time in a long time that I have a significant beau to shower with public affection. Then I realized it doesn’t have to be either/or because me loving The Fella is also about me loving me.
You know how when you find someone truly wonderful and right for you, you are able to see yourself differently? Or maybe it’s that you can finally embrace all the parts of you- the good and the bad, the faults and the talents- and, in a way, fall in love with yourself through their eyes. They help you be true to you. Their love reflects back onto you and you just. . . shine.
Being with The Fella is like this.
The longer I am with him, the more I realize that my baggage, while mismatched and definitely exceeding carry on status, is not the end of the world. Because, amazingly, he wants to help me carry it and even (gasp!) help me unpack it. That’s one of the many things that tell me he’s a keeper. He sees the real me (when I let him, granted I have moments of being guarded) and he keeps looking me back straight in the eye. He is unwavering in his affection for me. Whether I’m falling apart crying or in a PMS rage or making a fool of myself dancing around, he’s there next to me, accepting me. He’s honest even when it is difficult to be. He tries. And in that trying? Proves again and again that he chooses me.
I love him for many reasons both big and small and nestled among those is how he makes me feel about me. We are two imperfect people loving each other imperfectly but with all the gusto we can muster. And that? That just what I’ve always wanted.
So this year, in the spirit of Snackie’s Self-Love Day, I’m loving myself for being a risk-taker. Taking the risk to be vulnerable is what brought me to The Fella.
(Here’s the part where you are supposed to tell me one thing you “love” about me. No pressure! Happy Valentine’s Day, friends.)
“If you were falling, then I would catch you./You need a light, I’d find a match./Cuz I love the way you say good morning./And you take me the way I am./If you are chilly, here take my sweater./Your head is aching, I’ll make it better./Cuz I love the way you call me baby. And you take me the way I am./I’d buy you Rogaine if you start losing all your hair./Sew on patches to all you tear./Cuz I love you more than I could ever promise./And you take me the way I am./You take me the way I am./You take me the way I am.” –Take Me the Way I Am, Ingrid Michaelson