Over the three day weekend, maybe it was Sunday night, a tenant knocked on my door. At 1:30am. And the building was not on fire or flooding.
Startled awake by the loud rapping on the door, I bolted upright thinking, “Do I have zit cream on my face?!” Because trust me when I tell you that this is a fear of mine- that I will forget I put it on and answer the door in my half-awake state with a big white dot of blemish medicine on my chin. This to me would be more embarrassing than wandering the halls braless, which is totally what I ended up doing.
Apparently Smell Lady has decided her new nemesis is noise. Standing there with a hat on, sweat pants, a t-shirt and a towel wrapped around her shoulders (Why? I have NO IDEA.), she told me that there was someone playing loud music and she couldn’t sleep. Groggily, I followed her upstairs and stood outside her apartment listening. Looking at me she says eagerly, “You hear it?” Um, no. I hear nothing. I hear my bed calling me. Her neighbor is out on the balcony smoking so I ask him if he’s playing music or anything. “I’m watching a movie,” he said somewhat befuddled. I asked him if he could try turning the volume down a bit and see if that helped. Meanwhile, cape lady is just standing there awkwardly in the hallway. She is a grown woman in her forties with a ten year old kid and she can’t handle this shit on her own? She thanked me and I shuffled on back to my apartment.
Not fifteen minutes later, she knocks again. This time, I’m not as nice when I answer the door because HELLO it is 2am and I am not amused. She claims she’s figured out which apartment it is that is playing the music. The offending apartment is on the floor below her (my floor) and across the stairwell from her. Explain to me how noise from below would carry up and across a fucking stairwell. I just don’t get it.
But of course, I deal with it. I could only hear the music when I stood directly in front of the apartment. I knock on the door and crazy cape lady throws a hasty “thanks” my way and rushes upstairs. When then tenant playing music answers, she’s just as confused as I am when I tell her that her music is keeping someone up. She was nice about it and since no one knocked again, I assume it resolved itself. I went back to bed annoyed and unable to fall asleep for close to an hour.
On Tuesday night another tenant called at 10:30pm saying there were people outside of her bedroom window smoking and talking. Um, yeah, that’s what people do outside. She claims this happens a lot and that she has not complained about it before but it’s a problem. Especially that night since she had to be up early the next day for work. I asked her, “Have you poked your head outside and asked them to keep it down?” She replied, “Well, no.” Ok, here’s where people really start to irritate me. What the hell is the problem with politely asking someone to keep it down when you are trying to sleep? Calling the manager to handle these petty annoyances just makes you look like a tattle tale and a passive aggressive wimp. Or maybe I am projecting.
“I really encourage you to handle this directly with your neighbor. He’s a very understanding guy and would probably feel bad knowing he was keeping you up.” She hemmed and hawed saying she’d talk to him the next time she saw him and then said in a rush, “Oh they went inside!” thus relieving her of dealing with it for another day. I understand confrontation is scary. I don’t particularly relish in it myself but I am glad I told her that she needs to deal with that, not me. I am not doing anyone any favors by catering to these paltry complaints.
I will tell you this though- I am THIS close away from handing out earplugs to all my tenants.