At lunch with a friend the other day I grappled with a way to describe relationships. All around me many of my nearest and dearest are struggling in their relationships with their significant others. An analogy came to me that, while not my best work, suited the situation.
Relationships are like snow.
At first, snow is a beautiful thing softly falling outside that you are happy to see. It gives you a thrill. You don’t mind staying up late just looking at it. You want to run out and play with it. You want to feel that way about snow forever. You can’t even imagine not loving snow. You get all starry eyed just talking about snow. There’s adventure with snow: you make snow angels and ski and sled and have a snowball fight. You walk in its quiet calm. You take a lot of photos and in each one, you’re beaming.
The snow keeps falling and falling and falling so you go out to shovel it. You need a way through. You spend hours and then days shoveling snow out of the way so you can have a clear path. It seems that each time you clear the walkway, more falls. You wonder if it is worth it. But then you see a glimmer of its beauty and you press on.
Of course it is worth it.
But time inevitably passes and the novelty wears off. You’ve start to feel bored and restless. Seems it’s the same thing day after day. And you’re sick and tired of shoveling. Outside, the streets are piled high with unplowed snow. You feel stuck. You want past all the patches of ice and piles of snow but you don’t have the right tires.You reach out to a friend who has the right kind of car and they pick you up. Bumping over solid chunks of ice that coat the roads, you feel fear. You spin your wheels in a pile of snow in a parking lot and have to get out and push- getting your pants caked with mud in the process. You think that maybe not having the proper tires was a sign: You are not prepared for snow.
Along the roadsides, the snow sits in dirty clumps. Gone is the pristine purity. You forget why you loved snow in the first place. It seems a distant memory. You don’t know how to get back the elated feeling from the beginning. You start to wonder what you ever saw in snow. You long for Spring.
Until your allergies start acting up. Then you’ll long for Summer.
Until you get too hot and the fans don’t cool you fast enough. Then you’ll long for Autumn.
And so on.
And so on.