The Mob Takes Over

Three of my oldest friends weigh in with their Boyfriend Review Board questions…

It’s Supple’s turn to weigh in with her Boyfriend Review Questions:

  1. If Sizzle were to be the vivacious and extremely extroverted woman we know her to be at your best friend’s party, and started singing what would be your reaction? Would you a) start a duet with her, b) would you watch on with the look of amazement and love in your eyes, c) would you back off, or d) would you go hide in a corner in embarrassment?
  2. Do you believe in surprise parties?
  3. Are you gay? Because Sizz has already gone down that road.
  4. Do you have a girlfriend or are you married? Please note that the internet can supply us with a boatload of info to support or deny your claim, so you better answer honestly!
  5. Do you like sushi?
  6. Do you drink?
  7. Do you do drugs?
  8. Do you know what the color taupe is?
  9. When was the last time you had sex and can you last more than 2 seconds?
  10. Can you handle the Sizzle Swizzle? (Me: Um, that’s another post entirely. Ahem!)

It’s not a review board without my dearest Jenny Two Times. I’m so impressed she kept it to five questions. That’s so unlike her!

  1. What are you passionate about? You know, that “thing” (whatever it is…well as long as it is not, say, porn – that it is bad- but passion about porn is a bit creepy) that puts fire in your belly? What is it? Why? Cuz, Sizzle is passionate about many things and it puts excitement in her life. You need have that too, your own.
  2. What do you like/love about yourself? Qualities you admire about your being. Qualities you admire in others that you may also see in yourself. What is something(s) you are working on about yourself? None of us are perfect, so we get that you’ve got “stuff”. What are those challenging qualities you have? (Me: That’s actually multiple questions in one but I’ll allow it.)
  3. Do you like music? Because music is a must. Really.
  4. Have you ever cheated on a significant other? If so, what were the circumstances?
  5. How do you feel about family? Are you in contact? If not blood family, do you have a chose family? Maybe friends you consider family?

James Dean, my dear old friend and former boyfriend (the only boy I ever lived with!), of course has questions of his own:

  1. Eleanor Roosevelt, Hot or Not?
  2. Let’s just pretend for a moment that you are at work at the very moment the zombies begin to rise up and take over the planet, would you barricade yourself at work in an attempt at self-preservation or would you fight your way through zombie-infested streets to be with the woman you love?
  3. If you could travel through time and do one thing, which would you do? a) assassinate Hitler all ninja-style using little sharp Stars of David, b) wearing an ape outfit, pretend to be Bigfoot at documented sightings, thereby perpetuating the myth, c) try to find out what’s up with Napoleon’s hand, d) would only travel through time IF the woman you loved could come along
  4. Would you use your one prison phone call just to call up the woman you love? (Me: Woah woah woah WHY IS HE IN PRISON!?)
  5. If someone tried to attack you and your love and you stepped up to protect her, what would you do to the attacker? a) go Medieval on his ass, b) go Edwardian on his ass, c) go Bronze Age on his ass, d) go Post-Modern on his ass

What do these questions prove? Well, not only do I have extremely awesome friends but also that I have a bit of a my own personal mob. Mikey is clearly into chivalry and maybe knows a bit more about history than I do. I still don’t get what the Napoleon hand thing is. (Anyone?)  Jenny Two Times cares deeply about music and family as do I. And Supple cares about a good lay which is one of the many reasons I keep her around because someone better be keeping that at the forefront. Have you noticed that my friends seem to have a commonality in their questioning? It’s like they KNOW me or something.


Tomato and I are hosting a special call-in show on Sunday at 5pm. Won’t you join us? I’d love to chat with you! You can listen in by going to The Baub Show website on Sunday or download the podcast after the fact via iTunes. But listen! Join! Let’s chat!


17 thoughts on “The Mob Takes Over

  1. The Napoleon hand thing is that odd bit of how he always has his right hand tucked into his waistcoat in paintings, like here:

  2. I’m suddenly curious about the ‘Sizzle Swizzle’.

    Is it your signature dance style or your signature ‘style’ behind closed doors?

    Or perhaps both? lol.

  3. I love the ‘taupe’ question. Too funny! You’re a lucky lady to have so many caring friends in your life…

  4. This one made me laugh out loud:
    3.Are you gay? Because Sizz has already gone down that road.

    Heh. 🙂

  5. Those are awesome. I think I liked Mikey’s the best. Although the others were also fantastic. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if guys actually HAD to answer questions like these before we would date them? And then we could give them a special certificate if they passed…

  6. I am a little frightened that my husband asked my son a revised version of Mikey’s 2nd question, just this morning. (It’s all part of his emergency preparedness training)

  7. The questions are GREAT. I think you totally have to use this on the next guy… 🙂 (YES, there WILL be another guy… and with all your friends’ help, he just could be “Mr. Right”!)

  8. You can never forget to ask if they have (or have ever had) a pair of chrome (or other material) BALLS hanging from a car or truck hitch. It’s very important to know that…

  9. These review board posts crack me up! Your friends are fabulous!
    5pm PST is 1am my time so I can’t call in or I would die the next morning *sobs* Earlier next time? Please??!! xx

  10. It’s clear you are in good hands here. You have excellent friends who are posing excellent questions. If they let one in, no doubt it will be a winner.

  11. Ok Sizz. I am going to pretend that I am a boy(girl)friend in training for Sizzle and answer Supple’s questions! =)

    1. My answer is (b) but I would add a long sweep her off her feet kiss afterwards~!

    2. I believe in the kind of surprise parties where I know about them in advance but pretend not to!! hehe

    3. I am GAY but in the great way that makes me think Sizzle is hot! haha

    4. Does a Pug count? =)

    5. Just say no to sushi. But Im happy to buy sushi for Sizzle!

    6. I drink but am happy to share a glass of wine.

    7. Definitely say no to drugs!

    8. True story: I have a taupe ‘problem’ … ask Chico. I love taupe, talk about taupe and can find a shade of taupe in everything I look at…

    9. Way too long ago but I am a girl and can last FOREVER… haha

    10. Do tell.

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