I was at Jenny Two Times’ house on New Year’s Eve morning, fresh from a solid 9 hours of coveted sleep, when I went to the kitchen to make my morning cup of tea. I opened the fridge to see a carton of half and half and a carton of milk. I grabbed the milk and poured a couple tablespoons into my cup. As I puttered around her apartment getting ready, I drank my tea thinking it tasted a little different. I wondered if I had put in too much Splenda. I carried on.
Jenny came into the kitchen as I was sitting down at the table eating my eggs and toast. She’d made coffee for herself and went to the fridge to retrieve the carton of half and half. She saw the carton of milk (that I had used- now twice since I was on my second cup of tea, mind you) and said, “Oh I should throw this out. It’s been in here since November.”
WHAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTT!?!
I spit out my tea.
“November?! I AM DRINKING THAT RIGHT NOW! Oh my God I am going to throw up.”
I leapt from my chair and hurled myself towards the sink, discarding my cup of tea and frantically looking about for something to rinse my mouth out with.
Ew.
Luckily, I did not get sick. Only psychologically.
*****
I came home from my trip to the Oregon coast to a pretty empty fridge. I was craving toast so I grabbed some bread from the fridge and made some. I was on my second piece when I spied something on the crust that did not look like a seed or grain. Upon further inspection I realized it was in fact mold.
I should really turn my lights up brighter so I can see and maybe, not make food when I am half-awake.
******
Let’s recap. In the past month I have:
- Eaten spoiled chicken (and paid the price mightily)
- Drank sour milk
- Ingested moldy bread
I’m looking at this as me just strengthening my constitution. By accident.
Sizzle Says 
I got the shivers just reading about you drinking rotten milk. I think that’s far worse than ingesting a little mold (penicillin anyone?!).
I wouldn’t do those things on purpose… but here I think that adage applies: what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Literally!
yuck
remember one time, I ate a bad sour cream and onion potato chip and my dad said ‘what did it curl your teeth?’–still remember the taste of that demon chip–hope those food ghosts leave you soon 🙂
…yikes, i think Chris Griffin captures your moment
Been there. Did that. Over Christmas.
Damn faulty Frig.
I will eat food that has been left out on the counter overnight (which apparently is a big no-no), but I always smell the milk container before I pour, even if I just opened it.
I think you are building your immune system and that soon we will see news programs about how drinking spoiled milk is good for you! You are a pioneer.
I am normally hyper vigilant about milk because I have sensitivity issues. Monday morning I was half-asleep, distracted by the dog at my hip and making my tea, not really paying attention to the milk I was stirring into it. Like you I started drinking the tea, thinking it tasted a little funny. But kept drinking it. It wasn’t until I grabbed the milk out of the fridge again yesterday and was knocked over by the smell when I opened the carton that I realized I’d ingested sour milk the day before. I’m gagging again even now just thinking about it.
Ick!!! Very very few things gross me out more than sour milk. I’m so glad that you didn’t get sick!!!
After a VERY BAD day last week, I almost made myself a cocktail with Caramel Apple martini mix that expired in NOVEMBER 2007.
I had a beer instead.
I’m just glad you’re still around to tell us about it.
My girl just a couple of weeks ago drank some half and half that I wouldn’t have even put down the drain for fear of IT getting sick.
Yes, brighter lights…that’s the key!
P.S. I’m here from LSL.
Yikes! Perhaps you are building up your natural bacteria or something?:)
Hahaha sorry this cracked me up. I have eaten a whole bowl of cereal before only to realize that the milk left in the bowl at the end is bad. I think bad things like this only happen in 3s, so you should be good from here on out.
My husband likes to remind me, as I diligently test my son’s milk, that sour milk is just on its way to becoming yogurt. Still… ick.
Spoiled milk is the WORST. Ugh. I’m nauseous just thinking about it.
This is why I smell milk products before drinking them. Even when I’m in someone else’s home and they have offered me a glass of milk. I have to smell it before I drink it, even though I look like a rude jerk. I took a large swig of spoilt milk once. Years ago. I remember it vividly.
So basically you are saying your New Year has started off on a rotten note? 😉
LOL!! Sorry to laugh at your expense but those are things I would do myself. But still, didn’t your tea look a little funny too? Usually when that stuff foils you get those white specks floating around at the top. Yuck! Spoiled chicken is the worst though…physically!
LOL. I love that you shared that story. I have a really embarrassing story of a friend eating cereal from our house that had BUGS in it. I kind of wonder if she made the whole thing up.
I think I just threw up a little. On the bright side, like you said, it does strengthen your constitution!!
Heh!
(Um, welcome back!)
Ultra-pasteurization is a scary thing. Month-old milk should reek as soon as you open it. The fact that it was, by evidence of your health, totally fine is more troubling than the fact that you drank it. Crazy dairy chemicals….
Yum! Makes me want to clean out my fridge tomorrow morning! My mom is pathalogical about keeping things too long, but what makes it really bad is that she’s a nurse, so she THINKS she can tell if something isn’t safe – Take care of yourself!