I am still feeling stuck.
I’m having trouble shifting my focus onto healthy self-care and find myself repeatedly self-sabotaging. I’ve been wallowing in the depths of my negative body image and frankly, I’m sick of it. Sick of the hurtful things I say to myself. Sick of only seeing ugly when I look in the mirror. Sick of it I say!
I buy an unlimited yoga pass each month which allows me the freedom to sign up and cancel classes without penalty. It’s a powerful motivator to attend as many classes as I can. But there are no classes in my level offered on Saturdays (for example) or on some of the days/times that are more convenient for me. Short of totally changing my work schedule to accommodate yoga, I am forced to attend after work classes. I am much better and consistent at working out when I do it in the morning. Possibly with the meditation class I start tomorrow I will be forced to dedicate morning time to me, yoga, and my practice. (I hope. I need a kick in the ass.)
I love walking and have dropped a significant amount of weight solely doing that one form of exercise in the past. Sadly, there have been a rash of muggings and attacks in my neighborhood making me, the certified self-defense instructor, wary of going out on early morning walks. Especially because I wear my iPod when I work out. It just doesn’t seem smart.
I have slipped here and there with food. Refined sugar and white flour have slipped back in and the results have been rather…bitchy. It doesn’t happen daily but it’s happened more than I like or care to admit. I know those foods make me feel like crap and eat more food than I need to eat and yet I PUT IT IN MY MOUTH.
Sheesh. Get some willpower, Sizz.
Oh and I haven’t been to the pool in months.And I have a coupon for a dance/martial arts class but haven’t found the time to fit it in. Can someone get me 4 more hours in a day?And a personal trainer?
Scheduling is definitely a conflict. At least with exercise like running, you can plug it in here or there because it’s mainly a solo activity. With exercise classes, you have to modify your lifestyle to accommodate them. Despite timing conflicts the bigger issues is I seem to have lost my enthusiasm for losing weight and it’s replaced with guilt and shame. Those are not powerful motivators. I need something to click back into place for me because going backwards is not an option. Trying to fit in yoga, therapy, work, social life, errands, etc. – there still doesn’t seem to be enough time in the day. And yet, that’s an excuse because we make time for what is important to us.
So what is it I truly want?
- To feel good in my body.
- To feel lighter in my body.
- To feel strong in my body.
- To feel energized.
- To be healthy.
- To have more options for cute clothes. (Materialistic of me but true!)
- To feel less frantic and go-go-go all the time.
- To feel proud of myself.
It’s time to rewrite the master plan and get to it.
What do you do when you need to reconnect to your health and fitness goals?