The sun was shining so we spent the day leisurely strolling our neighborhood, sipping tea while watching hipsters and their dogs, their ill-fitting clothing and bed head hair take to the streets. We went grocery shopping and filled our fridge and pantry, not worrying about the cost. We took ourselves out to a nice dinner, courtesy of a Group On deal, and sipped on a minty gin drink while discussing work and life. We laughed for a couple hours as we watched and listened to David Sedaris read from his latest book and his personal diary. Then we made our way to a wine bar for a little dessert.
I took a moment to check in with the world via Twitter while Mr. Darcy stepped out to take a call. I simultaneously discovered that Bin Laden had been killed and two friends of ours had gotten engaged. I sat there flooded with emotions. The din of the restaurant surrounded me. Two people next to me at the bar were discussing Osama and I chimed in briefly. Then I began to wonder what was taking Mr. Darcy so long. Something struck me in my gut. I recognized it as dread and in walked Mr. Darcy, his face a mix of shock and defeat. The caller did not share good news.
A day can go from sunshine and laughter to pulling the rug out from under you in less than 5 minutes. What was reality shifts like tectonic plates and your world gets tossed from here to there, breakables dropping, and your heart racing.
He had been feeling ill at ease. Signs were pointing to it not being a good fit but we tried to talk them down, dismiss them and chalk them up to new job jitters and old neuroses. But his gut instinct had been right (aren’t they always?) and his new place of business ended his contract after a measly 2.5 weeks. They didn’t even give him a chance. Angry, shocked, embarrassed, sad- you name it, the emotions were tumbling around. I grabbed his hands and looked into his eyes, “We are going to be okay.”
Mr. Darcy is an amazingly talented artist who was put in a position that did not work to his strength at a job that clearly has some leadership issues. I know there is something better out there for him, a place that will provide him the space to flourish, not give him misdirection or make him doubt himself. Sometimes bigger isn’t always best. I don’t want him to doubt for one second that he’s not capable, strong, and worthy. I know I can’t make him feel anything but I will be there, standing beside him, because we are a team.
Sometimes life hands you a test and you have to smile at it, walk into the fear of it, holding your love’s hand.