Many of you are privy to my growing irritation with my 3G iPhone. For months now it has only intermittently charged despite the fact that I have 3 different charger cables. It will stubbornly only accept a charge from my car charger which has probably led many a neighbor to wonder what on earth I am doing in my driveway sitting in my parked car at all hours of the day and night, not actually driving anywhere.
I took my iPhone to Apple where the Genius Bar employee plugged it into a charger and on first attempt, it gave her the same asshole message it’s been giving me “charging is not supported with this accessory”. Which, if you didn’t know, is just its way of flipping me the bird. On the 2nd, 3rd and 4th attempts it synched up and charged.
We tried my charger and it worked. Even I tried plugging it in and it worked. My iPhone was putting on quite the performance! So I took it on vacation and OF COURSE it didn’t work with my charger. Not once. But! It would work with my sister’s charger and, yes, in the car.
To put it mildly, my phone has been making me angry.
So. . . last night right before Mr. Darcy and I were leaving for his birthday dinner, I went the bathroom. Yes, yes, I know you don’t really want to picture me peeing (trust me, I don’t want you to either) but this is very important for the rest of the story. I got up from the toilet and as I turned to flush my iPhone flew out of the shallow pocket of my dress and plopped right into the toilet. During those few seconds as it flew through the air in a trajectory of imminent demise my life slowed. It was like inside my head I was screaming a slow “noooooooooooooooo!” but was paralyzed to intervene. The moment it landed I immediately reached in and grabbed it, pawing off the protective case and wiping it down.
I stuck my hand in my own urine. That is how addicted to my iPhone I am.
I ran to the fan, turned it on full blast and held it in front of it while screaming to Mr. Darcy, “I DROPPED MY PHONE IN THE TOILET!” He looked up fixes on the internet while I used the hair dryer on it. Then I stuck it in a bag of rice as I lamented how as much as the phone has been a pain in my ass for months, I am lost without it.
A sad, true fact.
Twitter and Facebook friends gave good suggestions and at least I know I am not the only one to get my iPhone wet. After leaving the phone in a bag of rice overnight the screen still has some water damage and it’s a bit slow but it’s working. Kinda. I made an appointment with the Genius Bar for today anyhow and will likely bite the bullet and purchase a 4G. I had been holding out for the 5G but with the charging issues and now the dip it took in the pee pool, I can’t wait.
It’s days like this where I miss the simplicity of my flip phone. Or, hell, our old rotary phone that didn’t have call waiting.