Intention: 1. A course of action that one intends to follow. 2. An aim that guides action; an objective.
Every year for the past five years I have set an intention that sets the tone for the coming year. First there was acceptance. Then gumption. Then putting myself first. Then letting go. Last year’s intention was to be light. And this year? Well, I felt stuck when it came time to choose. It felt forced like I HAD to do it because I’d been doing it all this time (I hate quitting). I was starting to feel frustrated and irritated about the whole thing. So, I stopped forcing myself and just tried to back off and let it come to me in its own time.
I’ve been such a go! do! decide! act! kind of person for so long that being open to letting things happen in their own natural time is new to me. And yet, it’s exactly what I need to be doing. The word that kept coming to me when I stopped forcing my thinking was “openness.” At first I waved it away. It’s too simplistic. It’s too vague. But again and again, I heard it and saw it and felt it and so OKAY I GET IT.
2012 will be the year of Openness.
It seems fitting really. After all these years of learning to accept myself, stand up for myself, put myself first, let go and be light, focusing on openness allows for me to put all those other previous intentions into practice altogether. I struggle with being closed off to my own heart, my own wants and needs, and subsequently my own happiness. The opposite of being closed is being open. A lot is on the horizon for me- a lot of really good, beautiful, life-altering stuff- and I want to feel it with my whole heart and being. I want to be alive in it and let myself be vulnerable to the feelings. I want to be open to the people in my life and not be overwhelmed with a sense of responsibility for them and all their feelings (that doesn’t work, by the way) but rather accept them for who they are and where they are with compassion.
I’ve got my arms thrown open wide. I’m ready to embrace you, 2012.
(After the jump are a recap of last year’s goals and some more concrete ones for 2012.)
A year ago I set some 2011 goals:
1. Pay off all my debt VERY CLOSE
2. Bulk up my savings I DID & THEN I DIDN’T
3. Study up on home ownership CHECK
4. Take a dance class with Mr. Darcy NOT YET
5. Redesign my blog PENDING
6. Get my side business up & running IN PROCESS (Logo & web design in the works- estimated announcement date: April 1st)
7. Grow my hair out SHORT HAIR FOREVER
8. Stop biting my nails WORK IN PROGRESS
9. Maintain a daily meditation & yoga practice SOMETHING TO FOCUS ON IN 2012
10. Find an aerobic exercise I enjoy & can commit to YES! NIA!
11. Practice loving myself more rather than beating myself up WORK IN PROGRESS
12. Open a checking account with Mr. Darcy for our joint bills CHECK
13. Read more, watch less television COULD DO BETTER
14. Be crafty COULD DO BETTER
15. Visit the beach more CHECK
16. Travel to somewhere warm I DID
17. Call a friend once a week (stop relying solely on texting or emailing) COULD DO BETTER
And so as I welcome the new year, I thought I’d set my sights on a new action list:
- Launch Jubilation (my event planning business, oh yeah that’s what I’m calling it)
- Re-design/Re-focus Sizzle Says
- More yoga
- Find my meditation practice again
- Continue to dance my way to body acceptance
- Face Time/Skype with loved ones more than emailing/texting
- Read & craft more than watch tv
- Buy a house with Mr. Darcy
- Continue caring for my body through diet & exercise
- Continue deepening my connection to my own heart by living more in my feelings
- Cultivate joy and seek out laughter
- Continue to be financially savvy and stable