I’m lounging on the couch on Saturday morning. Mr. Darcy wakes up and in his groggy, morning way comes over to lean over the back of the couch to give me a good morning kiss.
I apologize if it’s too much information but this is important to note for the sake of the story: Mr. Darcy is naked in this scenario.
Me: Don’t rub your penis on the couch!
Him: My wiener is not dirty.
Me: All wieners are dirty. (I was raised Catholic. This is what they taught us.)
Him: My wiener is cleaner.
Me: Vote for wiener! Your slogan can be- my wiener is cleaner!
Him: It’s an erection year.