Helping Hand

I have a friend in need of help so I’m coming to you, internet friends. Because the internet has shown me time and again that it is helpful and compassionate and generous.

(Remember when my cats got sick and the internet helped me pay for one cat’s vet bill? $1200! The internet is awesome.)

My friend, Phil, is an amazing man. I’ve known him since high school -that’s 20 years for those counting. He actually visited Seattle last summer and we got to reconnect. On that trip he talked a lot about his kids, Cali (11) and Gus (7). He beams with pride and love when he shares stories about them.

But coloring all that good stuff is a lot of sadness. You see, Phil and his ex-wife have had a contentious divorce and it’s involved a lot of lawyers, court dates, negotiation, and tears. Just a few weeks ago a Maryland Judge ruled that Phil’s ex-wife can move their kids 800 miles away to Georgia from the only home they’ve really even known, where their school, friends, community, and dad are. Why!? When even the lawyer for the kids recommended against it. Even when Phil had a very strong case. Even when his ex-wife’s lawyer thought the judge would rule in Phil’s favor..

Dads often get a bad rap- and some of them deserve it- but Phil is an outstanding father. He would do anything for his children and is, since he’s burned through all his savings, his parents savings, and taken out a loan to pay for all the legal fees incurred to fight for his children. He’s currently stuck between a big rock and a very hard place. He will not live away from his kids but if he moves to Georgia the nearest place of employment for him is 2 hours away from where his ex-wife plans to relocate. (He has a specialized military job.) That would mean he couldn’t see his kids very much or be a part of their daily lives (he currently has the kids every other day). Plus, he’s locked into a specific child support payment that he would not be able to make if he left this field of work.

It’s a heartbreaking story. Even if you don’t know Phil, you can sympathize with a man who loves his kids more than anything and is facing losing them.

To appeal the judge’s ruling he needs $18,000 to cover legal fees. He’s putting his story out there, as hard as it is to ask for help, hoping others will be moved to donate.

If you would like to read more about Phil’s story and/or contribute, please click over now. Every little bit helps.

Thank you, kind internets. I know you’ll be good to my dear friend.

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6 thoughts on “Helping Hand

  1. Oh jeez. My heart is totally breaking for your friend and his children. I don’t have any money to donate right now but I will keep him in my thoughts and donate if I can later.

  2. As a child of divorce, I can’t not help. I gave just a little, but hopefully everyone else will do the same and it will add up to a lot. Good luck to your friend.

  3. This is really awful. We went through this when RB’s ex-wife moved their pre-schooler out of state. Unfortunately, many, many states rule with the natural mother. I wish Phil luck!

  4. Sizzle – this story broke my heart! Unfortunately I don’t have any extra money that I can give right now, but I did think about something I could do to help pass the word… so I wrote an email to the Ellen DeGeneres show with the link to his story! I don’t know if anything will come from it, but I figured if nothing else, maybe it would at least shed some light on this injustice.

  5. (I love your new look, so adorable!!!) This is really sad. I hate divorce, even though I totally understand the need (I’m divorced) but i wish people just stayed in love and nothing bad ever happened. I feel for your friend, I hope he gets the help he needs!

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