I went Friday with my sister to pick up my wedding dress. I brought along the bolero I purchased from Etsy, a fake flower for my hair (for sizing & look since I hope to wear a real flower in my hair the day of), and my shoes. Getting the dress on was easy enough but when I put on the bolero, it just didn’t look right. The soft lace of the jacket did not match the more modern style of the dress. Disappointed, I took it off and thought “there goes $40 to waste.” We clipped the flower to my hair but I was just not feeling it. I felt dumb in all that white. I felt like I was failing at dress up.
When I stepped out into the communal mirrored space, I was already a little defeated. I have been concerned all along that I bought a strapless gown knowing full well I do not like my arms and am afraid I’ll have “back butt.” It’s a lot of bare skin up top and I’m distracted by it. Without a shrug to cover that part of me, I was obsessing on it.
The dress had been taken in at the waist and side plus hemmed and 11 bustle points were added. There was only one issue with one bustle that was a little too high along the hemline so I asked for it to be fixed. I also noticed that where the folds of the material along the chest/waist area was some imperfections. I pointed them out but the seamstress, who was meek and unhelpful, keep saying “that’s how the dress is.” She was offering no sympathy or support or helpful suggestions. She called out Bertha, a head seamstress, to look at it. Bertha was not any better. She fussed with the folds of the material and pinned here and there when I would point out an area where the material was puckering while softly muttering under her breath, “ayyyee, mmmm, hmmm” with no actual communication WITH me. I finally had to say “Am I being crazy? Or does it look bad?” I didn’t want to be a bridezilla or rude to anyone but they were not being encouraging or helpful at all. Their silence was unnerving. They claimed the dress was pressed but yet there were obvious wrinkles in it. Frustrated, I gave up after pointing out 5 areas I wanted fixed and went back into the dressing room to cry.
I didn’t feel pretty and my dress looked cheap (even though with alterations it’s now cost us $700).
My sister tried to comfort me but I just wanted to get out of there. The seamstress called into us asking if we’d like to wait why they fixed the dress. I said no and thought- how can they fix it that quickly? No wonder their work looks like crap. When I stepped out of the changing room she informed me that I’d have to pay $5 per tack. There’s $54 more dollars I didn’t plan on spending. She could tell I was upset but didn’t really offer any solutions. I had to pay in advance to get it fixed but I could call the manager to discuss getting it comped. I paid, rescheduled my dress pick up time, and left tearful and dejected.
I gave into a weekend of looking for new dresses on line and lamenting my dress choice. I know we don’t have the budget or time for me to scrap this dress and get a new one. I’m stuck on what I will do about a jacket or sweater. It will be late October in Seattle and there will be a chill in the air so I’ll need something. I had such a hard time finding the first shrug, so I don’t know how I will find the next one. I don’t want to wear a pashmina/wrap because I don’t want to fiddle with it or have something so fussy on but I might just get one as a back up. I’d like a vintage, cropped, beaded cardigan but where to find it with only a month to go and in my size?
I hope I get over this feeling. I just hope I can feel beautiful on our wedding day. If I’m crying, I want it to be happy tears.