The wedding ceremony was very important to us. We wanted it to be reflective of who we are as a couple- sentimental, humorous, and sweet. From everyone we’ve heard from, it was all that and a tearjerker. So many people have told us they cried during the entire thing which totally touches my heart. I remember looking out and catching a glimpse of Jeni Angel and Long Story Longer’s faces and seeing them smiling with tears in their eyes. Tomato says he cried from start to finish and he doesn’t even like weddings.
I apparently swore twice during the ceremony though I only remember the first instance. When I got up to Mr. Darcy and took his hands I said “shit” because I was so overcome with feeling. We all laughed. I guess I wouldn’t be me if I hadn’t slipped up like that. Me and my potty mouth!
I thought I would share the vows that Mr. Darcy and I wrote for each other so you could get a glimpse into the ceremony. It all seemed to go by so fast and all of a sudden Jenny Two Times (who did a great job officiating) was saying it was time to say our vows and we looked at each other like- ALREADY?! I love how they are both so us and how we said similar things without knowing it. (We didn’t know what the other was saying ahead of time but Jenny Two Times made sure they were balanced.)
Mr. Darcy’s vows to me:
My Dearest Sizzle (he used my real name of course),
Almost six years ago, I moved out to Seattle to make a huge change in my life for the better. I came here expecting to make a better career for myself, to learn and grow, and to push myself in new directions. I didn’t think that would come to Seattle and find the love of my life. I thought my chance for finding someone to spend my life with had passed. I was resigned to being a nerdy bachelor who doodled monsters for a living. Thankfully, the world has a way of giving us what we need most when we expect it the least.
Prior to meeting you, I wasn’t sure that Seattle was a place I could ever call “home”. Now, I can’t think of anywhere without you as home. Moving to Seattle to meet and fall in love with you is the best thing that has ever happened to me. It may seem cliche, but I really do feel like the luckiest man alive when you smile and tell me you love me.
My love and admiration for you grow every day we spend together. The fun days. The carefree days. The hard days. Everyday you choose to build a life with me and I with you. Through all of the laughter and tears, you are there to rejoice and comfort me, to hold and be held, to kiss and be kissed. Knowing that I have you with me on the journey in life makes me believe that any obstacle can be overcome and every success celebrated in a superb grand fashion. Having you in my life challenges me to be a better person. It is a challenge I accept every day and pursue with all the energy I have. You have taught me to think outside of myself and embrace the world around me. I love the life we have built together – our home, our cats, the mutual support and kick in the ass we give each other when we need it. You are my best friend in the world. I know I can trust you completely and without reservation, and that comforts me in a way I can never truly convey.
Listing all of the things I love about you is a bit overwhelming, but here goes:
- Your kindness and charm are like no-one I’ve ever met.
- You have style and flair that most people envy. Your smile is infectious.
- Making you laugh is one of my reasons for living.
- I love your confidence – both the quiet and brash assuredness that you live your life with.
- I love your thoughtfulness and attention to detail.
- I love the way you challenge yourself to be a better you. And I want to be a better me just to keep up.
- I love your compassion for others. You open your heart easily to those in need and it is stunning to watch.
- I love that how engaged with life you are. You remind me of how beautiful the world is and how much there is to explore when I’m too busy looking inward.
- I love that you can be carefree and dance at a moment’s notice.
- I love to hear you sing.
- I love sitting on a couch with you as you watch your favorite shows and I make fun of them.
- I love looking into your eyes.
- I love kissing you any chance I get.
- I love your cats that have now become our cats.
- I love all the things I’ve invariably forgotten to say about you.
All that’s left say is:
- For the rest of my days; I choose you.
- I promise to treasure and nurture the love that you give.
- I promise to show up, every minute of every day for our relationship
- I promise to treat you with all the kindness, respect, and appreciation that you deserve.
- I promise to make you laugh every chance I get.
- I promise to play you in Scrabble any sunny day we can – and even let you win sometimes.
- I promise to love your family and friends the way I love my own.
- I promise to cherish every moment we have together – even when we are cleaning up Dash’s butt.
- I choose you every day.
- Thank you for being my person.
- Thank you for choosing me.
- Thank you for marrying me.
- I’m all in. For ever.
My vows to Mr. Darcy:
I looked a very long time and had almost given up on meeting you, my Mr. Darcy, and yet here you are standing in front of me on our wedding day. You are my dream come true.
When we first met almost 3 years ago, you told me that you “grew up around women like” me- meaning strong, independent, opinionated (some might say bossy) over-thinkers. At first I wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or not but then I met your mom and your sister, saw the incredible love you have for them, and recognized traits I’d tried to downplay my whole life suddenly as assets. I was never sure if a man could handle me but it turns out you can. From our first date I knew something was different about us.
I used to think that wanting to get married meant I was weak. I was never that girl who dreamed of her wedding day. But I was so wrong. Saying yes to marrying you is the bravest thing I’ve ever done. Loving you has made me more tender, more vulnerable, and more trusting. You have softened my defenses and I am stronger for it.
There are so many reasons why I love you. I’ve made a list of the highlights.
- You are genuine, honest, and trustworthy.
- You are hilarious. You make me laugh all the time even when I’m crying or mad at you.
- You think I am funny which means you have excellent taste.
- You could eat your weight in bagels yet you can’t tell the difference between zucchini and squash.
- You are unflinchingly generous.
- You look at me like I am the only girl in the room and tell me I am beautiful even if I just woke up from surgery, have a head cold, or a zit.
- You are steady and thoughtful and easy-going.
- You are wicked smart and it’s cute how you get all riled up during political conversations.
- You love your family and have come to love mine.
- You are loyal and stand by your friends.
- You are an incredibly talented artist and are passionate about nerdy things of which I will probably never understand.
- You always show up for me.
- You will make an amazing father if we are lucky enough to be parents though you will probably worry way too much. .
- You love our cats even though when I met you you were not a “cat person.”
- You are a man of integrity and character, strong values and morals.
- You will always try for the sake of our relationship even if it’s uncomfortable.
- You are a total sentimental sap and even though I rib you for it, I kinda love it..
- You work at our relationship with as much care and focus as you do those tiny little men you paint.
- You protect my heart like a warrior.
I love you and this little life we have created and the journey we are on. I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else- even when I’m angry at you, even when your farts stink up the place, even when the pungency of your morning breath almost makes me pass out. You are my person. You make me feel like the best self. Thank you for loving me just as I am.
Today, in front of our most beloved family and friends, I give you my heart. I promise to:
- always be honest with you, even when it’s difficult
- never stop working at our relationship or myself
- make your dreams as important as my dreams so that we can share one dream for our future
- stand by you in good times and bad, laughter and tears, health and sickness
- strive to be open and let you see the real me
- show up, even when I’d rather hide or run away
- give you room to make mistakes and change
- encourage and challenge you to be your most authentic self
- offer you my unwavering support, encouragement, and compassion
- make you laugh and smile
- accept you for all that you are
- respect and trust you
- listen to you with my head and my heart
- stand by your side as your biggest fan, loudest champion, and best friend
For the rest of our days, I promise every day to choose you.