They Say The Truth Will Set You Free

November 28, 2007 at 9:13 am | In life lessons, my neurosis, processing | 39 Comments

I’ve done things I am not proud of. I’ve made split-second choices and long thought out decisions that, whether right or wrong, have shaped who I am. Here’s my top twenty. . .

  1. I’d pretend to “run away” from home and proclaim I was adopted but the only attention it’d get me is from my little sister who loved me more than Barbies.
  2. I have kept the money when the cashier gave me too much change.
  3. That one time we were all playing in the old Mustang in the garage, I opened the car door knowing she’d fall onto the concrete floor. She was the bratty sister of my friend and we were all annoyed with her.
  4. When I worked at Baskin-Robbins, I gave away so much free ice cream and watched other coworkers do the same. It’s a wonder that place is still in business.
  5. I hit a car in a parking lot but didn’t leave a note.
  6. You were right about that one guy. I just couldn’t face the truth then.
  7. I used some of the free Jamba Juice coupons donated to my place of employment for myself.
  8. I slept with an ex while he was dating someone else. He’s marrying that someone else now.
  9. I’ve driven drunk.
  10. I threw a potted plant at someone who had hurt me. It didn’t hit him. . .but I kind of wish it had.
  11. I’ve made people feel small so I could feel bigger.
  12. I hoped the most popular girl in school would have a very pathetic future because she was so mean to me.
  13. I fell in love with another woman’s husband. She found out. She must hate me. (I don’t blame her.) They are still together.
  14. I gave a fellow student my homework to copy in 8th grade.
  15. I never believed he would change but. . .I always hoped.
  16. I say I don’t want to get married but 75% of that is just pure fear that no one will ever want to marry me.
  17. I’ve never faked an orgasm. Mostly because I worry I’d do it wrong.
  18. I’ve never made myself throw up in an effort to lose weight…but I’ve thought about it.
  19. I’ve fooled around with someone else before I’d completely ended the relationship I was in.
  20. That wasn’t sage that you smelled in my room.

I wonder: Are we born with character or does it develop? Can the good in a person out-weigh the bad?

“This is my skeleton/This is the skin it’s in/That is according to light and gravity/I’ll take off my disguise/The mask you met me in/’Cuz I got something for you to see/Just gimme your skeleton/Give me the skin it’s in/Yeah baby, this is you/According to me/I never avert my eyes/I never compromise/So never nevermind the poetry. . .” -Shameless, Ani Difranco

39 Comments »

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  1. I love this post. You’re so honest, and it’s so refreshing!

    Comment by alissa — November 28, 2007 #

  2. Wow, nice laundry list you’ve got there. I would do the same, but then, my entire family reads my blog. Not quite ready for full disclosure on some things.

    Comment by Jen — November 28, 2007 #

  3. I love this post. We all have done things in our past we’re not proud of. I’m so impressed you’re willing to admit it to the world.

    Character most definitely develops. We are a compilation of our life exposures and experiences.

    Comment by Nilsa S. — November 28, 2007 #

  4. I used to fool around with potted plants… then smoke them. But I’m better now, so yes, I think the good person can out-weigh the bad.

    Comment by Rick — November 28, 2007 #

  5. Freaky-deaky–it’s like you read my mind b/c lately I’ve really taken stock of myself as a person and had to do a lot more forgiving of myself than anyone else.
    Then I remembered that if I accept others for not being perfect, well, I damn well better accept myself for that too. :)

    Comment by diane — November 28, 2007 #

  6. Interesting list… I think character is something that develops or is learned. In some of these cases, you were just being assertive and there’s nothing wrong with that.

    Comment by Fluffycat — November 28, 2007 #

  7. I sure as heck hope it’s a little of both.
    Thanks for doing this– it helped more than just you. :)

    Comment by justrun — November 28, 2007 #

  8. You arent alone… I share 6 of those with you

    Comment by Scotty — November 28, 2007 #

  9. I think it’s nature and nurture — and the good outweighs the bad when we decide it does.

    Comment by sandra — November 28, 2007 #

  10. There should be a movie made about your fun adventures! :)

    Comment by kilax — November 28, 2007 #

  11. Congradulations, you’re Human. So am I…let’s hug!

    Comment by Tobiwan — November 28, 2007 #

  12. Love this post…who in the food industry didn’t give free stuff away to friends? I probably ate my weight 10 x’s over in FroYo when my BFF worked there in high school. I remember scooping toppings into plastic baggies. The boss counted cups, so we would bring our own. I got free Mexican food, Free meals from Hungry Hunter, McDonald’s Happy Meal toys, I miss those days and my giving friends :o)

    Comment by Foo — November 28, 2007 #

  13. I am laughing at #7 because I have this folder full of donated coupons for my student workers and I almost took a Starbucks one this morning for myself.

    Naughty.

    Comment by rosie — November 28, 2007 #

  14. love this post! I’ll be thining about my list.

    Comment by Melissa — November 28, 2007 #

  15. We all have a bad side. Most of the time the good outweighs the bad, but we can’t forget or deny that we do have this bad side.

    I’ve done a few of those things, too, and I think I’m a good person. So, you know. There’s a little perspective for you. ;)

    Comment by Alison — November 28, 2007 #

  16. Do you feel better now? I’d hope so. :) I have a similar list that has put me on the “naughty” list more than once.

    Comment by G-man — November 28, 2007 #

  17. I love this! Bravo! I really want to do it, but I think I’ve aired enough dirty laundry this week.

    Comment by abbersnail — November 28, 2007 #

  18. They do say that the truth will set you free.

    tell me, have you been feeling burdened by this list?

    Do you feel better now?

    Comment by Mr. Rodacre — November 28, 2007 #

  19. I take my hat off to you! I wish I could be so honest.

    I have to think more on the character question. That’s a toughie.

    Comment by The Diva's Thoughts — November 28, 2007 #

  20. great fucking post!

    can i meme the hell out of this and do it myself? i figure with one hand and one bad thing a day, i should be done yanno..by christmas!

    here are the ones that i have done too (just so you feel better): 2,4,8,9,11,13,15 and 16 in the past.

    Comment by Hilly — November 28, 2007 #

  21. I think this is one of those lists that most of us can probably check off at least 75% of what you wrote, and something tells me that you could probably write a list 10x as long about all the good things that you’ve done. I was just having this conversation yesterday about how I feel like the one time I snap at someone (you know, like Ted) somehow erases the other nine great things that I did. The bad seems to always outweigh the good, in others’ minds and hell, even our own.

    Comment by Becky — November 28, 2007 #

  22. Anyone who claims to be born with character is a LIARHEAD.

    On the other hand, I’ve done things that make you look like Mother Theresa. :-)

    Comment by Tracy Lynn — November 28, 2007 #

  23. Wow, how refreshing that you even had the courage to hit “publish.” I loved this list. There are so many blogs that list the every 100, (including mine) and other lists but this one is my favorite!

    Comment by Claire — November 28, 2007 #

  24. You are just human Siz…. your honesty makes you that much more attractive!

    Comment by NerdGirl — November 28, 2007 #

  25. Did it set you free? I’m curious.
    I think we are all born with character, weather it’s a positive or negative one, that’s the difference. I think people can be taught to behave, and morality can be developed, but will a bad person ever be good? I don’t know about that.

    Comment by Jen — November 28, 2007 #

  26. I’ve done 2, 4, 5, 9, something similar to 10, 11, 14, 15, 16, 18 and 19 too. And many worse things! It’s great to be human.

    Comment by maja — November 28, 2007 #

  27. You are very brave to admit your truths to all of us. I can barely admit them to myself.

    Comment by Airam — November 28, 2007 #

  28. I’ve never faked an orgasm. Mostly because I worry I’d do it wrong.

    ROFL

    I’ve never faked one either.

    Comment by TC — November 28, 2007 #

  29. Oh Sizzle- the good definitely outweighs the bad! I think we’ve all done many of the things on your list. I haven’t been here in awhile, but this was a great idea. I should write my own list- I’m just afraid of seeing it all in writing!

    Comment by 180/360 — November 28, 2007 #

  30. I think it is 20 years since I have seen a Baskin Robbins. Indeed, is it still in business?

    Comment by dmarks — November 29, 2007 #

  31. someone new loves you. leave your past behind.

    Comment by nother — November 29, 2007 #

  32. You are not alone, my friend. I’ve done many of the same things.

    Comment by Lisa — November 29, 2007 #

  33. Amazing how many of us have done the same things… you are just brave enough to tell about them. ;)

    Comment by sue — November 29, 2007 #

  34. You’re me…but over there, in another city, with fab hair and unfortunately under the weather.

    Comment by Ruby — November 29, 2007 #

  35. Not such a bad list by my eyes. I believe character does develop over time, after all isn’t character how you deal with situations as they present themselves?

    It got me thinking about what my list would be, but since that started to depress me, I got to musing over the math of weighing the good and bad. Personally, I think you’re due for a list of what you’re proud of about yourself/your accomplishments. If you gave everything a weight from say 1 to 10 for each separate list (where 10 would be most proud for the proud list and least proud for the not proud list), you could actually decide if the good outscores the bad.

    Comment by claire — November 29, 2007 #

  36. In high school, I worked at a TCBY and did the same thing you did at Baskin Robbins. Except, instead of just giving it away, we let our friends come around the counter and just make it themselves.

    Our TCBY didn’t fare as well overall as your BR. It’s been shut down for a decade and a half.

    Comment by kapgar — November 30, 2007 #

  37. Very nice post. I think the bad stuff is what makes you a good person.

    Otherwise you’d just be naive and possibly preachy.

    Comment by whit — November 30, 2007 #

  38. This was such a good post! Ooh, Sizzle I like your bad side. But yes, I do think the good in a person does outweigh the bad.

    Comment by emmaenlighted — December 2, 2007 #

  39. [...] spreading the art of living « PS365-91 Junk December 4, 2007 A favored blogger, Sizzle, recently aired her dirty laundry. A list of things making her less than perfect. Or, in my [...]

    Pingback by Junk « SoMi || learning :: exposing :: sharing — December 4, 2007 #


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