Snowmageddon ’08
December 21, 2008 at 2:49 pm | Posted in the super | 37 CommentsI don’t mean to state the obvious but IT IS SNOWING in Seattle. And it won’t stop. It just keeps coming. And coming. And coming doooowwwwwwn.
A wise friend taught me a valuable lesson two years ago:
“Snow is like a penis. If it isn’t 6 inches, there’s no point.”
For the record, we’re way past six inches. There’s a point to all this penis, I mean SNOW.
Ahem.
You know how I sometimes complain about vacuuming the apartment building? Yeah well I found a new apartment management task that I dislike more- shoveling snow. While it’s a good work out, I could do without it. This morning I went out and shoveled and shoveled and shoveled. I have photographic evidence:
Our building was the only one for blocks and blocks to have a clear walkway. That either makes me a very good manager or a stupid one. Because about an hour later, it started to snow again. At least there is salt down now so ice won’t accumulate. Or will it? What the hell do I know? I have never lived in snow before.
The snow is like creme brulee out there- a crunchy top layer of ice with soft snow underneath. Even though creme brulee is yellow in color, please do not eat the yellow snow. It’s not actually creme brulee!
I know I proclaimed to be a lover of snow and I *do* love it. I just wish Seattle was better equipped to deal with it. And that I had friendly elves to install chains on my car. And that I wasn’t such an ice pussy so that I could actually drive in it.
The good news is: I have booze. I am totally set. If you need me, I’ll be here drinking in my pajamas.
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Could I actually be the first comment or perhaps the second? Wow, that’s a first. I too love snow, but hate to drive in it and really hate shoveling it.
Have fun in your jammies :-).
Comment by Annie— December 21, 2008 #
Dude, that’s amazing, because I, too, am in my pajamas, AND my happy socks (heavy wool)but I am not boozing, because nobody really wants me drunk and loose in Seattle.
Comment by Tracy Lynn— December 21, 2008 #
Yay! We’re all in our PJs!
Comment by Fella— December 21, 2008 #
HAAAAAHAAA! The six inch concept is perhaps the most hilarious thing I’ve heard in quite some time. Love it. :)
Comment by metalia— December 21, 2008 #
I want snow! How fun! :)
Comment by Keely— December 21, 2008 #
Ice Pussy. HA HA HA HA HA! Love it.
Comment by Long Story Longer— December 21, 2008 #
I wish I was hanging out with you instead of working.
Excellent point about the creme brulee snow! I walked through 7 inches of penis creme brulee today to get to my bus. Guess it’s a good thing I’m straight and like desserts. :o)
Comment by Jaz— December 21, 2008 #
I’ve been watching the Seahawks game today and it’s insane how much is coming down! It’s comparable to our snow, and hello?, I live in Canada!
Fingers crossed you stay safe and warm during this pretty snowstorm you’ve got going on!!
Comment by brandy— December 21, 2008 #
ALso, I too am an ice pussy. I refuse to drive anywhere!
Comment by Jaz— December 21, 2008 #
You have Snowmageddon too?? That’s what they’ve been calling it on the news here. Ugh. I saw the Seahawks game this afternoon, and wondered if you were still enjoying the snow. Just stay off the roads. You are not the only one who is not used to the snow.
Comment by Sarah— December 21, 2008 #
You need an ergonomic shovel if you are going to do that kind of thing! Trust me!
Comment by maman— December 21, 2008 #
Dammit I wish it would snow here in Phoenix. Still, I have booze. And pajamas. So I have 75% of the requirements.
Comment by Kevin Spencer— December 21, 2008 #
Love the saying.
Ok. I am not a snow expert. If they are calling for the snow to turn to freezing rain in the near future then you are best to leave the snow, it’ll crack under people’s weight and they it won’t be so slippery. As an added bonus, you can use that as an excuse to stay in your jammies and have another drink.
Mmmmm… rum
Comment by Nat— December 21, 2008 #
My advice to you is to Enjoy the liquor in pajamas! No one should have to come out in that!
Comment by wildbill— December 21, 2008 #
First I just have to say how incongruous the snow pictures look combined with your header. Second, what the heck is the rainbow thing on your tire? I can see the chains, but the other thing??? Third, it can’t last forever. Hopefully!
Comment by Vanessa— December 21, 2008 #
I love a day when you wake up, shower, and then put your pajamas right back on. What I do not like? TWO DAYS like that in a row. I just want to GO SOMEWHERE.
Comment by Rhi— December 21, 2008 #
Me? I do not love snow. I do not love this particular snow because it RUINED my plans to move into my NEW house. So instead, I sit in my pajamas, in my rental house, and drink. When I should be packing.
Comment by Kate— December 21, 2008 #
we’re at a foot plus here and it’s still coming down. ive been doing a lot of drinking and still haven’t showered yet today. productive.
Comment by brookem— December 21, 2008 #
I love your creme brulee reference. That is the perfect description!
Comment by Jen— December 21, 2008 #
It is officially the shortest, snowiest, drunkest day of the year.
CHEERS!
Comment by jonb— December 21, 2008 #
CHEERS.
:)
Comment by Angella— December 21, 2008 #
If it weren’t so effing cold, I might like it a little more this year. Can’t you tell I’m in the spirit? :)
Comment by justrun— December 21, 2008 #
Yay for snow! In Minneapolis, there’s a lot. I love it. I love that we are snowed in and may be that way until Christmas. If we could use it as an excuse to stay home and not travel to visit family (I’m looking forward to the family part, not the travel part), I would love it even more!!
Nice job shoveling. I felt really bad for our resident manager who has been shoveling for four days straight! I took her cookies, but I’m not sure if it was payment enough!!
Comment by NGS— December 21, 2008 #
OMG, thank god for the liquor cabinet! And, for the record, I wish my pj’s looked like my two year old’s footed jammies because it is FRIGID! Enjoy the cabin fever!
Comment by Kandace— December 21, 2008 #
Can you believe this??? I thought I missed snow, being from Chicago, but this absotively sucks. It’s just not stopping!!! I ended up staying home on Friday, but there’s no way I can do that tomorrow! Ugh. I can’t find a street that gets me downtown that isn’t packed ice and a 35 degree angle … I have a feeling my funeral will be within a week …
Comment by Matt— December 21, 2008 #
I have to admit I’m really happy I don’t live in Seattle anymore and that is a big reason. I do feel for all of my friends and family though. However, we did get snow in Vegas last week and that was crazy cuz it hadn’t snowed that hard since the 70′s! Good luck and stay safe!
Comment by ShellyD— December 21, 2008 #
I love snow… alas, I live in south Florida! Drinking while in PJ’s with snow outside… sounds pretty darn good!
Comment by thequeenlisa— December 21, 2008 #
Snow is fun for playing in, though maybe not when it’s creme brulee! Not so much for walking to work in.
Comment by maja— December 21, 2008 #
We have a lot of snow too. I am very good at shoveling and, because I am a freak, I sometimes enjoy it. Except for when I am shoveling and it starts snowing again and accumulating where I just freakin’ shoveled! Gah! Ahem. We have a lot of snow.
Comment by Melissa— December 22, 2008 #
Dammit, I have chains installed, but no booze in the house. I think I need to get my winter priorities straight! ;) Oh well, at least I actually get a snow day today, so I’m spending the day in my jammies baking cookies and watching movies.
Comment by fairydogmother— December 22, 2008 #
My poor brother and sister-in-law are stuck in Seattle due to all the snow, so boooooo snow!
Also, have you thought about a snow blower? I swear, your life will be so much easier!
Comment by punchlinewalking— December 22, 2008 #
I’m at work when I want to be in my jammies!
WAH!
Comment by Ashleigh— December 22, 2008 #
I’ve eaten the yellow snow.
I had visions.
Comment by Non Fiction Burning— December 22, 2008 #
I love snow. I know you’re sick of it, but we haven’t had any. Can we get some of yours?
Comment by Jess— December 22, 2008 #
haha … snow snow and more snow :-D
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Comment by Kristy - Where's My Damn Answer— December 22, 2008 #
I was checking out the snow on top of my car: a good 3 inches, then a big old plate of ice and another 3 inches.
If snow is like a penis.. Seattle is a porno right now. The news said 9 1/2 inches this morning and more to come. (cum?)
Comment by kim— December 22, 2008 #
[...] EVERY OTHER INCH of the united states would be white. sirrusly. i mean…boston, maine, seattle, and even the southwest (!) is covered in snow right now. if i find out that key west has a white [...]
Pingback by i live in a snowglobe. without the snow. « me, unplugged— December 23, 2008 #